Trust is one of those things that everyone needs, but it’s quite possibly one of the hardest things to attain.
My BFF and I were shooting the sh*t over dinner, and we stumbled upon “trust” as a topic of interest. As we went through the motions, it occurred to me that trust, one of the pillars of a strong, healthy relationship, is more than just knowing that your partner isn’t going to cheat on you.
Trust is about so much more. Trust is about the kind of life you share.
Between past and recent experiences, I have come to find that trust is about knowing that your partner will always have your best interest at heart.
Feeling safe with your partner is closely linked to trust. I don’t mean “safe” in the sense that you are in imminent danger, but the type of safety where you know they will make the right decisions for you both.
Knowing that you are with someone who wants only the best for you opens the door to so many exciting adventures and opportunities. Not only that, but you are more likely to have a healthy, balanced relationship.
Here’s what trust is all about:
1) Knowing that they always have your back
This person needs to stand up for you, no matter the scenario. If you are their valued number one, they should know how wonderful and intelligent you are and always have your back.
2) Knowing that they will consider you when making decisions
Sometimes it can be as simple as ordering pizza with or without pepperoni or as serious as moving to a foreign country. If your partner considers your thoughts and feelings when making choices, they’re a keeper. Relationships are a two-way street, and both people need to be considered.
3) Knowing that they will not push you past your personal limits
New experiences are the best part of any relationship. But if you’re with someone who is constantly trying to push you past your safety zone, things can get ugly pretty quickly. It’s important to be with someone who respects your boundaries and limits and won’t try to pressure you into doing things that make you feel unsafe. That is not how any “new and exciting” experiences should feel.
4) Knowing that you are the priority
If your partner puts everyone and their mothers’ needs ahead of yours, they most likely do not have your best interest at heart. Your well-being and happiness will be last thing on their list, along with your relationship.
5) Knowing that they will never purposely endanger your safety or well-being
Knowing that your partner is concerned about your safety and wellness is so important. Whether it’s driving safely when you’re a passenger in the car, or packing you a healthy lunch so you won’t need to order something at work—you’re obviously cared for.
6) Knowing that your partner will take care of you
Things happen in life, and sometimes they can be unfortunate. Knowing that your partner will always be by your side to support you is priceless. Taking care of someone comes in so many forms, and each of them is valuable. Accountability. It’s a big one.
7) Knowing that they will never hurt you
The last person you expect to hurt you is the person you love with all of your heart and soul. Hurt can vary from betrayal, to disrespect, violence, emotional abuse, etc. Knowing that your partner would never, ever mistreat you and values what you have together is one of the most beautiful things life can offer. Having that beats everything else. That’s true love and it’s amazing.
So, this trust thing…it’s really not just about being faithful. It’s about sharing a life with another person. You deserve to be valued and protected by your partner, whether you’re a male or female.
Trust and love go hand-in-hand—I like to call it the love cocoon.
Keep on living and loving whole-heartedly, you fine folks…