How To Really Get Over Her

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Close all your doors, batten down the hatches, put up walls, and shut everyone out.

Getting over someone is never easy, it’s not supposed to be. It’s supposed to hurt like nothing you have ever felt before. It’s supposed to crush your heart and destroy you. And hopefully, when you do get over her, you’ll be a better person.

Get rid of every single thing that reminds you of her, burn that napkin she wrote your name on and that piece of paper where she wrote your name a hundred times, they will bring only sadness and nostalgia. Stop reading that book she lent you, that was another place and time when you felt her love; you can never get it back.

Avoid places that remind you of her, that place along the road by the beach where she said “Park!” and kissed you, that winding road where you used to go on long drives, hands clasped so tightly together that they became numb, that place where you first kissed her, and that place where she first kissed you back. That spot in your office where she hugged you so tight it felt like all the broken pieces of you had come back together at last.

Don’t look to your right when you’re driving, because even now you still expect to see her there. Don’t turn on the radio, because it will play her favorite songs, even now. Don’t open your browser, because one of those tabs will be your last message to her. And don’t sleep unless you’re exhausted, because all your dreams will be of her, as they have been for a long time.

Rent another place, sell your car, get rid of your phone, change your password because it’s her birthday, change the locks to your heart because what once was can never be again and you have to accept that.

Because getting over her means trying to live your life without her in it. It is waking up each morning feeling less and less of a loser for not having her in your life. It’s waking up every day not hoping to see her or talk to her. It’s discovering each day that you can breathe without her name almost escaping your lips.

But most of all, do not tell her how miserable you are, how much you miss her, how you long to see her, touch her, talk to her, be with her.

Because it is bad enough that you’re hurting. It would make you feel a lot worse to know that she was too.