1. You think hooks, Butler, Lorde, Bannerji are just as much as your girls as they are mine.
2. You jump up in glee when I tell you I want to raise our kids ‘gender-neutral’ and in ‘non-gender conforming ways’, and truly mean it when you say you don’t care about their sexuality.
3. You talk politics with you over fair-trade coffee in a local café for hours and hours. Also works as pillow talk…
4. You’re proud of me when I SCHOOL someone on the internet for their misogynistic/racist/homophobic/transphobic/ablest comments.
5. When I tell you I am the happiest when I write a REALLY good paper, I want you to look at me like I’m the smartest (prettiest) person ever.
6. A man who watches his own use of language will really turn me on.
7. Nothing is sexier than a man who uses the words intersectionality, decolonize and patriarchy (particularly if he is down to smash it) in casual conversation.
8. Has an intersecting connection: cerebral AND physical.
9. He will respect my body, my soul and my mind BUT know your way around my curves with directions/without directions.