How The Other Side Feels

Flickr / Saxon Campbell
Flickr / Saxon Campbell

It started out with us locking eyes across the room. Soon there were shy smiles and ever so awkward conversations. This is where it should have stopped. Instead, I strapped myself in for the roller coaster ride of my life.

We started out as friends. I let you in. I told you my secrets in exchange for yours. Our friendship was great but there was always an elephant in the room. We were attracted to each other and sooner rather than later it was going to get in the way of things. And it did.

Our friendship progressed. I was happy with what we had. In the time we spent together, I could relax. I was comfortable where we were but I was so so blind. With the flip of a coin, you changed. You were no longer friendly. You were cold, ice cold. You were distant, if there at all. It seemed as if the person I knew no longer existed. While this was hard for me at first, I grew used to it. I learned how to survive without you as a friend. I was forgetting about you and all the time we spent together. And surely, just when I was finally me again, you waltzed right back into my life.

You apologized, said you never meant those things. But in reality, they were just excuses and lies. And silly me fell for them. So I let you in, again. I gave you an inch and you took a mile. Things were great; it felt like old times. We could joke and laugh. I had someone to talk to and so did you. I knew I was walking on eggshells with you but I chose to ignore it. I shouldn’t have. You were a ticking time bomb and, I, your next victim.

Just like that you were no longer my friend. You were rude, hateful, and insulting. I was being hit blow after blow with low remarks and comments. And I sat there and took them. I let you make me feel like shit. I let you make me feel inferior. Until I realized, I wasn’t. I realized you were the one who was. You’re the person who tears people down to make yourself feel better. You’re the one who doesn’t care about others. I was no longer going to let you play your silly little game with me. Next time, you’d be my piece in this giant chess game.

Sure enough, you came back for round three. But this time I was in charge. You didn’t control me. I didn’t do what you asked and called you out on your lies. I ignored your texts and, on the off chance I didn’t, I was rude. No longer was I the person you knew. I was cold, blunt and low. I purposely made you feel like you made me feel for far too long. I kept it up but I knew you would crack. And you did. You finally knew how I felt. I hope you learned what its like to be on the other side. I hope you see how you treat people. But in all honesty, what I really hope you get out of all of this is that we’re finally done. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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