How To Get Over A Breakup

Sometimes, when your heart breaks, it shatters. You feel like your life is over like this person is the ONLY person for you. You ball up and shut your friends and family out. It seems like this person was the love your life, your soulmate, the light of your life. Maybe they were, maybe they were the one. But, the second they choose to leave, or you choose to leave, is the second that you become the most important person in your life again. You should’ve been the most important, but love is more important to us sometimes. Don’t fret or blame yourself, almost everyone does it. The problem when we do this is: we begin to become codependent on our person.

When we lose our person, no matter how long the relationship was, it hurts. It hurts a lot, you might even feel like you can’t live without them. I promise you, you can. You CAN do this.

Focus on you, focus on your school, or work. Anything that will keep your mind busy, or at least a little. Join new clubs or do new stuff, find yourself again. Find who you are without them. You don’t need them, even if it feels like you do. And you know why? Because you are enough. Because you are you. The only person in this world that you need is you. You are the one who lifts you up and you are the one who is there at the end of the day. Take this time alone to realize your own worth, that is the most important step to get over someone is to realize it wasn’t you. Their actions are their own, and their decisions are the same. A fault in them doesn’t mean there’s a fault in you.

Don’t place blame, accept that you took part in arguments and everything else too. When you do this though, DO NOT ACCEPT ALL RESPONSIBILITY. It takes two to be in a relationship, not everything that happened was on them, just like not everything was on you.

Pick yourself up and move on. So it didn’t work. I don’t know what happened but what I do know is that there will be someone better out there. You don’t believe it now, but you will. There will be someone out there that will hold you as if you’re a fragile china set, someone that will love you as though you’re a delicate rose already falling apart. Maybe it was toxic and maybe it was as simple as you didn’t work, but regardless there is better. I get it, trust me. You’re in love with them and they’re not your world, but all your galaxies. You think about them before you rest your head on your pillow, and you think about them as soon as you wake up. They’re on your mind 24/7, but I promise you, it will get easier. You will start to love yourself for who you are, you’ll stop depending on them for everything: happiness, love, positivity, anything else you depend on them for.

You have to accept that some things just aren’t meant to happen, and that is, under no circumstances, your fault. Everyone has faults and will hurt someone at some point in time, this doesn’t make them a bad person, this just means that they have things to improve upon, just like you.

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I've always wanted to just help people, even if it wasn't much. Follow Ongeliq on Instagram or read more articles from Ongeliq on Thought Catalog.

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