1. Get to know her in small circles of close friends at first, not large parties. She prefers more quiet settings to think and observe things.
2. Give her time to think and respond. She’s an avid thinker and an over thinker. She needs time to think through scenarios before she responds. Don’t expect quick answers to anything, whether it’s a response via text or a decision about where to eat dinner.
3. Take her on simple dates. She doesn’t need anything elaborate. She truly just wants to spend time with you. Anything too elaborate will make her uncomfortable or self-aware that too many people are watching her. Take her to her favorite bookstore, read her a story, buy her a coffee. It is the little things.
4. Be patient. Independent introverted girls generally have a story to tell. You can’t drag it out of her, many have probably tried. Wait for her to tell it to you on her own time, and listen when she does. It’s usually a beautiful story and it will help you understand her better.
5. Give her space. It is when she’s alone that she recharges herself. When she realizes how much people mean to her. She becomes more appreciative. It is when she becomes better for herself and for others.
6. Initiate things but let her meet you halfway. Her inner introvert craves for you to lead. But at the same time, her independent side gives her the motivation to meet you in the middle. Involve her in your plans and she will be content.
7. Respect her. If she feels respected, seen and heard, she will match with unparalleled loyalty.
8. Don’t fix things for her. She’s built a life fixing things on her own. Work alongside her. It will mean more than you know to her.
9. Get to know her friends and introduce her to yours. Make her feel important. Be proud of her in public. More often than not, she has only had herself to remind her to be proud of her accomplishments.
10. Travel with her. See things and places at her pace and from her point of view. This will teach you the most about her and teach you some things you didn’t know about yourself. She tends to have that effect on people.
11. Sing to her, write letters to her, play an instrument for her. Do what you do well for her. She doesn’t care about flowers, and chocolate and material things. She cares about you. She wants to learn everything there is to know about you. Let her see your triumphs and your failures, and in return, she will let you see how she shines but also show you her scars.
12. Love her wholly. Her worst fears and insecurities lie in overthinking and the constant struggle with the question of, “Am I enough?” Make her know beyond a shadow of a doubt, with every fiber of her being that she is loved, body, mind and soul.