Do Not Compliment Me By Telling Me I Am Nothing Like Other Girls


How dare you say that ‘You are nothing like any other girls’
in this way, in that way that you had said it before
in a tongue that is practiced in those words,
like it is a privledge to be loved and lied to by you,
by being told I am special.

And then you tell me why
by putting all the others down,
that they were small in comparison
for the way they dress, think and are
for not being enough for you

You speak about most other girls
as though they are all less authentic
and therefore less worthy of your love and you.

Pitting me against them
in this insidious rivalry
that girls are taught and grow into
for a man or boy’s affections
is not something for me to be grateful for.

To be honest, it is a privledge for me
that I am just like other girls.
Because all those ‘girls’ you refer to
are my sisters, my mothers and my friends,
the very solace and the kindness I have sought
when the worst things in my life have happened.

How dare you assume
I should take that as a compliment,
as though we are all in a race
and our grand prize at the end is you and your lies.
Why should I beam at you like it is praise
when you are alienating me from those 
who have the same core as me in feminity?

If you truly loved me,
there are a thousand ways
to tell me you love me,
and making my sisters small
to make me big
isn’t one of them.

Tell me you love me, but not because I am different.

Tell me you love me, just because you do. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Nikita is the author of Your Soul Is A River and Your Heart Is The Sea.

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