1. She’s never approved of any girl you’ve ever dated. EVER. There’s always something wrong with the girl you’re dating. Her hair is too blonde, her smile is too white, her laugh is too obnoxious, her career is not a career at all. When you think your girlfriend is absolute perfection, your girl best friend who secretly loves you, will find something wrong with her.
2. She tells your girlfriend all of your dirty little secrets. She wants your girlfriend to know everything about you, she tells her the bad and the ugly, and leaves out the good. That threesome you had in college, your girlfriend will definitely hear about it from the girl best friend who loves you.
3. She tries to make your girlfriend look bad. This could apply both physically and mentally. If she tries to cut your girlfriend’s hair, DON’T let her. If she says she’s just giving her a trim, and she asks to borrow your razor, it’s going to be more than a couple of inches. Your best friend who’s actually in love with you attempts to sabotage your girlfriend’s appearance whenever she has the chance.
4. She talks shit about you to your current girlfriend. Your girlfriend knows that you two are best friends, which is why she finds it weird that she speaks of you so poorly. Your girl best friend who secretly wants to be more, talks bad about you to your girlfriend because she wants your girlfriend to think you’re actually a terrible person. She’ll make fun of your quirks, insult you relentlessly, and point out all of your flaws. Whether she knows she’s doing it or not, it’s an act of secret love and sabotage.
5. When it doesn’t work out with your girlfriend she pretends to feel bad. ‘Awe your relationship is over?! I’m so sorry!’ Deep down her heart is jumping with joy.
6. Or she outright says, ‘that girl was completely wrong for you anyway.’ Depending on your girl best friend’s personality, her authentic sympathy after your breakups may vary.
7. Whenever anyone says your name she gets a girlish grin. Remember when you were in 7th grade and you’d write your crush’s name all over your notebook? Remember the grin you had on your face while doing so? That’s the grin your girl best friend gets when other people talk about you. It’s because she’s in love with you, sometimes not so discreetly.
8. She hasn’t dated anyone in quite a while. When she tells you she’s going through a dry spell, she means she hasn’t dated anyone because she’s holding out for you. She’s probably hooked up with a few fuckboys here and there, but only to distract herself from the fact that she’s in love with you.
9. She tries to have sleepovers with you. When she has one too many drinks and can’t make her way home, she pretends like it happened spontaneously. She planned that. Those tequila shots were no accident, and they’re not the only thing she’s trying to lick, shot, and suck.
10. She becomes interested in everything you’re interested in. Before she met you she was listening to Carrie Underwood, but when she learned your love for EDM and attending raves, she bought a pacifier, a hula hoop, and put a dread lock in her hair.
11. She brings you to weddings as her plus one. She does this so that when you attend the wedding everyone asks, ‘Oh are you two dating?’ And while you both awkwardly respond, she’s hoping the amount of times people ask will get you thinking about it actually happening.
12. Her parents love you. Her parents tell her she should marry you, and her family talks about how you two will end up together. Trust me, it happens.
13. Her brother loves you. Even her siblings love you. You’re basically part of the family.
14. She brings you on family vacations. Her parents want to raise the potential of you two getting together, so they’re willing to share their condo in Puerto Rico with you for a week. You fully take advantage of the opportunity, and if you don’t you should.
15. She gets you really meaningful birthday gifts. She doesn’t buy you a t-shirt or a hat, she doesn’t buy you a new pair of shoes. She gets you a gift that means more, a gift that says, ‘I love you,’ because she does.