1. “I was just about to put a condom on, and she began to tell me how good of a mother she’ll be one day. Maybe it’s true, but really? That’s kind of why I’m putting a condom on right now.” —Marcus, 26
2. “She texted her mom, legit in the middle of humping me. When you’re humping me half naked the last thing I want to be thinking about is your mom…Unless she’s super hot, but in this case, no.” —Cameron, 23
3. “This one girl started talking about religion when we were in bed. And how she was born again and took the bible in a complete literal sense. I’m an atheist and it was painful to listen to. Rule: don’t talk about religion before sex.” —Jim, 24
4. “She got up in the middle to pee, and told me. She was just like, ‘Hold on a sec I have to pee.’ It would’ve been fine if she were my girlfriend, but we didn’t know each other. I met her at a bar two hours earlier, a little discretion would’ve been nice. Just say you’ll be right back. Now I have a clear image in my mind of you pissing on the toilet. Ehh.” —Aaron, 24
5. “She seriously started telling me how self-conscious she was of her vagina. I mean I took your panties off and I’m still here, clearly you’ve got something going for you, the whole self-loathing thing isn’t exactly a turn-on. If you’re fishing for compliments, I’m not going to hand them out about your vagina, that’s just weird.” —Kyle, 25
6. “Her dog was crying to get up on the bed, and she actually stopped, picked the dog up, and put him on the bed. And then she expected me to continue. I don’t want your dog licking my balls while I’m in the middle of fucking you.” —Pat, 24
7. “She started talking about Hillary Clinton. Enough said.” —Zach, 26
8. “We were making out, clothes off, having a great time, and about to have an even better one, and then she asked me if I was gay. I’m straight, not even bi.” —Mitchell, 24
9. “She kept asking if it was ‘consensual.’ I realize consent is a very important thing, but she must’ve asked me 20 times. The whole reassuring thing got kind of annoying. Yes, I want to have sex with you, stop asking.” —Luke, 24
10. “She asked me what angle she looks best from. Who cares what you look like, can you just enjoy yourself for the next 20 minutes?” —Anders, 25
11. “She took my pants off and sighed. I was like Wtf? Did you just sigh? She kept saying she was just breathing heavy. Okay sure, how would you like it if I took your top off and went, ‘Meh.'” —Chris, 26
12. “She was talking about her sick aunt. Yeah, that’s really sad, and I felt terrible for her, but nothing kills a boner like cancer.” —Cory, 25
13. “Anything to do with daddy issues. If we’re about to have sex don’t start talking about your absent father.” —Eric, 24 
