5 Things I Learned After You Left Me

Twenty20 / alexamundell
Twenty20 / alexamundell

1. I’m stronger than I think I am.

After you left I thought I had to piece myself back together, but eventually I realized you never broke me, you were merely a scratch to my surface. Because I’m not as fragile as I was when you left, in fact I was never that fragile, you just saw me that way. Sure, the scars you left will still be visible, but looking at them doesn’t cause me pain.

2. My happiness shouldn’t depend on someone else.

After you left I felt my happiness leave with you. I now know that I control the way it ebbs and flows, not you or anyone else. You can make me happy when I’m with you, but when you leave I have to be happy on my own.

3. Often times it’s the idea of someone you love, and not the actual person.

The idea you have of someone doesn’t always correspond to who the person turns out to be. I saw who I wanted to see, and not who you actually were. I saw how I wanted you to fit into my life, but I didn’t see that the fit wasn’t right.

4. I’m not disposable.

And someone who loves me will confirm that it’s true. It takes courage to trust someone else with your feelings, and when those feelings are taken for granted, your first instinct is to blame yourself. You left me because that was your decision, not because my love is expendable. No love is expendable, so when you leave unexpectedly, I’ll know it wasn’t real, and I’ll use that to let go and move forward.

5. It’s better to speak my mind, even if one of us is hurt by it.

Communication is the antidote of hurt, and honesty won’t kill you, but it won’t always be sunshine and rainbows. If there’s something on your mind I’d want the honest truth, that way if either of us chooses to leave we both will know the reason why. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Writer based in the Philadelphia area. Person who really loves her dog and watching cooking shows. Check out my writing on Thought Catalog and follow me on Facebook! Connect with me and submit your work on Collective World.

Keep up with Nicole on Instagram and Twitter

More From Thought Catalog