9 Men And Women Reveal The Most Embarrassing Places They’ve Been Caught Masturbating

Twenty20 / marioes
Twenty20 / marioes

1. “It was in my grandmother’s bathroom. My girlfriend at the time was uncontrollably sexting me, and she sent me a video of herself that I knew was meant to be watched in private. I took my phone into the bathroom, and had no idea the lock didn’t work. I had the volume down pretty low because I was paranoid my family would hear, but it wasn’t the volume I had to worry about. My grandma walked in on me when I was way into the video if you know what I mean, I think I nearly gave her a heart attack. Needless to say it was one of the most embarrassing moments of my life. My poor little grandma. She didn’t say anything to my parents, thank god.” —Peter, 25

beetlejuice

2. “I was staying at my friend’s parent’s house from high school, when we were back from college break, and she had one of those retractable shower heads, like the ones that come off of the wall. My parents don’t have one, and they definitely don’t have them in the freshman dorms at school. I heard they felt amazing when you (ya know put them down there), so I really wanted to try. It was a glass shower door, so you could see everything from the outside pretty well. I hiked my leg up on the side and started using the shower head, and my friend walked in without even a warning. She of course saw my leg hiked up and the shower head not in it’s usual position. She started laughing hysterically and said, ‘Everybody has needs.’ We were both cracking up even though I was partly mortified.” —Kelly, 23

beetlejuice

3. “I’ve never been caught masturbating anywhere embarrassing, but I walked in on my friend jerking off to a cooking show. I’m talking legit Food Network, it was really weird. I didn’t even bother asking.” —Danny, 24

beetlejuice

4. “In high school I was masturbating in one of the bathroom stalls, I heard someone come in and they of course used the stall next to me. It was sort of a boner kill so I stopped and left the stall to wash my hands, when the guy came out of the stall it was the school security guard. I was half embarrassed and half terrified.” —Andy, 23

beetlejuice

5. “My freshman roommate was a lacrosse player, and during the season she was always busy. If she wasn’t at a game or practice, she was in the library doing work. I basically always had the room to myself. One day my vibrator needed batteries and I of course didn’t have any. I was too lazy to ask around or go anywhere to get them, and I was REALLY in the mood. I knew my roommate had one, but we weren’t really friends so I knew it would’ve been weird if I used it (it would’ve been weird even if we were friends), but then I thought about it, and figured she’d never know if I was careful. I was about 5 minutes in, and who walks through the door, my roommate! She immediately knew what I was doing, and got really embarrassed and left the room before she ever really entered. I freaked out and put the vibrator back in her dresser drawer, she came back in about a half hour later, and apologized for walking in on me. I couldn’t believe she was apologizing. I told her no worries, and to this day she still has no idea that it was her vibrator I was using.” —Lauren, 23

beetlejuice

6. “I was a camp counselor in my summers during college, and I once saw a boy masturbating on a school bus. We were taking a field trip to another camp for a swim meet, and three boys in front of him were throwing Cheetos at each other, making a mess. I went over to yell at them to stop, and right behind them this boy was just going at it! It was so awkward and weird, and I didn’t even know what to do. I just screamed his name and told him that was not okay to do at camp! So gross.” —Jamie, 24

beetlejuice

7. “I was in a Starbucks bathroom and figured it was pretty perfect because it’s only for one person and you need a key to get in. Apparently I was taking too long, and one of the employees used their keys to get in. They already had the key in the door when knocking and didn’t even bother to listen that I was in there. They thought it had locked accidentally, WTF. Luckily it was a guy, if it was a girl I probably would’ve been even more humiliated.” —Justin, 24

beetlejuice

8. “My gym is open 24 hours, and one night I had to work until 11 pm. By the time I got home it was midnight, and I went to the gym which was basically empty except for one of the trainers who was a guy. After my workout I was in the locker room shower, and figured eh why not. I think I was getting pretty into it and couldn’t really control my moaning, I figured no one was in there anyway. When I finished, I stepped out of the shower stall to find one of the maintenance ladies cleaning the mirror. I turned bright red, and she smiled at me. It was actually kind of creepy now that I think about it.” —Miranda, 26

beetlejuice

9. “I had just been on a date with a girl, and when I drove her home we had a pretty steamy makeout session in my car. She was really hot, and I was extremely turned on. After she walked through the door of her house I started jerking off. She left her scarf in the front seat, and while I was enjoying myself she knocked on the window. That was our last date. I’m an idiot.” —Mario, 25 TC mark

Nicole Tarkoff

Writer based in the Philadelphia area. Person who really loves her dog and watching cooking shows. Check out my writing on Thought Catalog and follow me on Facebook! Connect with me and submit your work on Collective World.

This is me letting you go

If there’s one thing we all need to stop doing, it’s waiting around for someone else to show up and change our lives. Just be the person you’ve been waiting for.

At the end of the day, you have two choices in love – one is to accept someone just as they are and the other is to walk away.

We owe it to ourselves to live the greatest life that we’re capable of living, even if that means that we have to be alone for a very long time.

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