12 Women Share How They Feel About Sleeping With A Guy On The First Date

1. “All women are told, ‘Don’t sleep with him on the first date,’ because he will have his way with you and be done, or something like that, and I actually told myself before going out with him that night that I WAS NOT GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH HIM. I should’ve never had that internal conversation because it just made me feel worse when I gave in. Some women joke about it, how you wake up the next morning with a little less self respect and a little more self loathing, but all jokes aside it’s pretty real.” —Ali, 24

2. “My ex broke up with me about two weeks prior, and my friends were already setting me up on dates. The last thing I wanted was to be sitting across from a man and his dinner plate making small talk about what kind of music we listen to, but when they showed me his Facebook I was pleasantly surprised at how attractive he was. When I met him I wasn’t disappointed. He had a really nice smile and the entire dinner I couldn’t help but stare at his lips. He asked me if I wanted to continue the date after dinner, aka go back to his place and have sex, and I honestly just really wanted to know what his lips felt like. Women have talked to me about rebound sex before, and until that night I had no idea what I was missing. I didn’t care that it was the first date because I didn’t care whether or not he’d ever call me again. I just wanted him and those lips, right there, at that moment, and the number of dates we had was irrelevant.” —Becca, 25

3. “Why should I have to deny myself that satisfaction? If I want to fuck him on the first date, and he clearly wants to fuck me too, then why not? There’s no rule book on when you can and can’t have sex with someone and if women feel that way they’re delusional. Do what you want because you want to do it. I’m not going to put a damper on my sex life because of someone else’s opinions on my ‘promiscuous’ lifestyle. It’s my sex life and I’ll fuck if I want to.” —Lacey, 23

4. “Just DON’T DO IT. Trust me on this one. I speak from experience.” —Jackie, 23

5. “I’m all for it. Honestly that nonsense about him never talking to you again if you give it up, that’s just dumb. If he doesn’t talk to you after you’ve had sex with him it’s because he isn’t interested, bottom line. If you were this awesome girl and you had sex with him, he’s most likely going to call you again, if not he clearly doesn’t think you’re that awesome. It sucks, but the truth hurts, and if you can’t handle that then I don’t know, don’t have sex with him I guess.” —Zara, 27

6. “Just because I have sex with you on the first date doesn’t change who I am as a person. Yes, it might say something about my ‘morals,’ but how do my morals about sex really impact the type of person I am? Morals about sex, aren’t even morals! Okay, I love helping people; when I’m not working, I’m volunteering, so if I think it’s fine to have sex upon first meeting you, does that diminish those qualities about myself? Absolutely not!” —Lily, 26

7. “For me it’s all about trust. I’m not going to have sex with you if I don’t trust you. A) I don’t know where your parts have been or who they’ve been with, and B) I would never let you have the most important part of me if I don’t know what exactly you’re going to do with it. Sex is the most intimate connection two people can have, so if I don’t know you, I certainly don’t want to have an intimate connection with you.” —Veronica, 25

8. “I understand that people have needs, and while I have never had sex with someone on the first date, I don’t feel right judging others who have. It’s a personal preference.” —Meghan, 24

9. “For me, I’d just be too embarrassed to get naked in front of someone I just met. What if they comment on my abnormalities?! Because trust me I’ve got plenty. My confidence is lacking enough already, get me naked with a man I don’t know, it will probably be non-existent.” —Jess, 22

10. “I don’t know, I’ve slept with a guy on the first date who never talked to me again, and I’ve slept with a guy on the first date who dated me for about 4 months after. I think it has a lot to do with the guy, honestly. If he’s going to judge you about that kind of stuff anyway, (whether or not you sleep with him right away) is he even worth it? A real guy would take the time to get to know you regardless of whether you slept with him or not.” —Nichole, 27

11. “I had tons of one night stands in college, and it was because I didn’t care if I ever talked to, or saw them again. It was just about the sex. Now that I’m out of college and not binge drinking on a Thursday until 5 am, I’m not actively seeking one night stands. Maybe it’s because I’ve gotten it all out of my system, but I want something serious. From what I went through in college, I don’t think a guy would take you that seriously if you slept with him the first time you met. Maybe I’m wrong, but for me it’s not just about the sex anymore, it’s about the person, and I don’t know enough about a person from the first date alone.” —Whitney, 28

12. “Sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t. If I think the guy has ultimate boyfriend potential, I’m probably not going to sleep with him too soon. But then there are the guys who are so damn fine that I absolutely can’t resist them, and yes I will have sex with those guys, but I’m also secretly hoping they’ll want to be my boyfriend after.” —Jolie, 23