8 Signs Your Penis Is An Introvert


Have you ever wondered why some people just treat you a little bit differently than everyone else? Do you find it difficult to take your penis out and show your penis to other people? Have you ever noticed that you stand much closer to the urinal than others? It could be that your penis is an introvert! Don’t be upset, it’s actually really cool to be an introvert – it’s interesting and special and definitely something you should tell everyone about as if it were some kind of personal achievement. But, how exactly can you determine if your penis is introverted? Here’s some telltale signs:

1. People keep telling you that it’s a vagina.

At first, people think you’re joking when you keep calling the indentation between your legs a penis. But, are you? No of course not, it’s a penis, it’s just introverted.

2. You have to sit down when you pee.

The problem with urinals is they don’t stick out far enough. Doesn’t everyone else leak out of their introverted penis all over the floor? It’s easier to just sit.

3. You have boobs.

Yeah, so what. A lot of guys have boobs. It’s called being a gamer. Big deal. You could even say they are a point of pride. If you think about it, it takes a lot of effort to grow sweet, supple breasts.

4. Once every 28 days, it bleeds.

Okay so some people want to call that a period. Is it though? I don’t think so. You could just be bleeding out of your introverted dick because of the lunar cycles changing the gravitational pull on your body. It’s like the tides or whatever, it’s definitely not a period.

5. Your beard still doesn’t come in.

Again – no big deal. Sometimes guys just don’t get a solid beard until they’re thirty. You’ve got another two years before you hit that mark, at least. Maybe your beard is also introverted. Let’s just say that it is.

6. You earn 27% less than guys who don’t have introverted penises.

Okay, so maybe they have more experience than you, or the position requires having a penis that isn’t introverted? I bet the weight of an extroverted penis makes them sit further forward in their desk chair, which pulls them closer to the computer screen and therefore they are more productive. It’s not a vagina, your penis is just introverted.

7. You’ve got a sissy name like Katie or Sara, not a tough one like Brock or Jason.

Look, a lot of names aren’t gender specific. Jamie? Jamie can be both. So what if your name is Rebecca. I bet in other cultures, Rebecca would sound kind of tough. It’s just a coincidence that your name is Rebecca and you have an introverted penis.

8. Other guys fuck you in your penis indentation.

Come on, this is totally normal! This is just like sleep away camp stuff. If they had the introverted penis, they’d do the same for you. You’re just helping out a bro that wants to practice on your introverted penis so he can be good at fucking a girl with a pussy when he gets to. You’re just a normal guy with an introverted penis, doing normal guy stuff with his bros, that’s all. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Just a fun mom and a teacher at a retarded school. I like recipes and my kids.

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