This is how you reason with yourself – The timing isn’t right. You’re keeping your options open. Your ex is still in the picture. You can’t be tied down right now.
You give just enough to show that you’re interested in her, just enough to keep her interested in you, and just enough to make her think that your kiss means something.
Just enough, but not enough.
She waits for you. Her heart skips a beat at every vibration of her phone, with a never-ending hope that it will be you, and a never-dulled pang of disappointment when it never is.
Even then, she’s too busy searching the crowd of faces for yours to care about the heads that she turns. She defends you against the chorus of “You deserve better,” from her friends. She keeps hoping that you’ll prove them wrong, but you never do.
This is how you lose her.
One day, your chances will have run out. It won’t be one disappointment in particular. It won’t be one time that you didn’t call, or one night that you chose someone else over her.
It will be a day when the silence on your end is no longer a void, but an opportunity for new adventures, new loves, and freedom from your half-hearted efforts and meaningless promises that restrained her for too long.
This is how you lose the one that would have loved you, if you had let her.