You should be able to read her like a book by now. You should know when it is best to break this news to her as gently as you can. So, the moment you choose to break the news depicts how much you know her and how much you still care. Do you break it to her two days before an important exam? Do you absent-mindedly choose to leave on her birthday? The date you choose shouldn’t matter, but it matters when you cruelly take away a piece of what could have been better, affect her deeply more than she deserved, and replace it with shards of what is left of you.
Any break-up, despite the reason, is cruel to someone. So, don’t. Be sensitive for once. Don’t kill what’s left of her.
I know she doesn’t want anyone else but you. Why? Because you are the one who promised her things her friends couldn’t give her. You are the one who had her so hopelessly addicted to loving you. The blame is not on you for choosing to leave. But to have to break her, and then break all ties with her, and then leave her… Boy, do you understand what I’m trying to say?
You are leaving her quite alone, telling all her friends you still care for her when you are in fact a coward who pushes the responsibility of fixing what you broke onto someone else.
You are responsible for her because you once loved her.
There really isn’t such a thing as ‘she can fix herself.’ She can’t fix herself, because you still don’t think it will be necessary to sit down with her for five hours and talk to her about this decision. You think it will be natural for her to get drunk in the loud club, you think it’s okay for her to push everyone away. You think it will be fine for her to come home at 2 am and climb up to the roof to cry her heart out. You think it’s what everyone has to go through after a break-up. And you think it’s right to let her be because this is how she heals.
But I hope you know, deep down, that this is not how she heals.
This is how she drowns herself. This is how she numbs herself. She’s going to be out all night. She will see the worst in people during the bleakest hours. She’s going to meet more fuck boys who will remind her of you and the memory of how you just chose to get up and leave because it was much easier than talking about what went wrong; it’s much easier than giving reasons or second chances or talking about choices, even though it was important, you didn’t think so. You’d rather take the easiest way out. You coward.
Don’t become cold hearted just because you have to end a relationship. Talk to her, tell her why you chose this. She deserves to know why. She deserves to know what went wrong and even if you don’t know how to, you have to talk to her. Tell her how you feel. Don’t act like a fuck boy and just get up when things get hard. Don’t just tell her ‘We can’t be together’ or ‘This isn’t working out’ and think that’s the end. Just because everyone is doing this doesn’t mean it is right.
You have to understand that the upcoming days after this will be harder for her, so, if I may plead on her behalf, please, don’t make it any harder for her.
Please, if you once loved her, don’t be so cruel to her.