Moving on from past experiences is one of the most difficult things we will ever have to do as human beings. Whether you’re 18 and moving on from your first love who broke your heart, you’re 22 and just graduated college and have no fucking clue where to go in life, or if you’re 99 and know you don’t have much time left. You have to come to terms with your past or it is going to haunt you forever.
The moments that have come before now, the memories, the cities you’ve been to, the mistakes, the regrets, the bad choices. It is all in the past; it has ripped you down and built you up all at once. It has come and gone, it is in the rear view, and you do not need it anymore.
As humans, we grip. We hold onto things that happened before, whether good or bad we force ourselves to grip until we bleed out. We grip to the limbs, to the lips, to the minds and souls, of those who have loved and hurt us, because within them we have built homes. We hold onto our first “I love you”, our first heart break, our first death. We hold onto the memories, along with every single emotion that has ever been bestowed into us during those times. Nothing will ever replace how we felt. How the wind was knocked out of us, how we were unable to breathe, how our hearts felt shattered and broken.
It is all that emotion and feeling that hides in the darkest crevices of our minds, that keeps us from opening up and loving again. Those are the thoughts that come crawling out during the worst times, to remind us of the past and to make sure we never forget those terrible memories. What I have learned through my experience is that it is possible to let go, you just have to allow yourself.
We must move on from all that was, and will never be again. We must understand that there is something beautiful waiting for us on the other side of it all. We can cry, we can mourn, and most of all we will grow. We will grow more than we ever thought possible from the lessons we have learned from the past. Everything happens for a reason, this is certain, and these things occur for us to acquire the knowledge of our mistakes and our pain. With this we will choose to let the past go.
Loosen your grip. Free yourself from the baggage that has built up over you. Never forget the lessons you’ve learned, but don’t allow them to keep your heart bitter and guarded. The funny thing about life is this: You will always have quirks that are reminiscent of your loved ones, habits from people who have left this earth, or thoughts that remind you of someone you knew, or somewhere you’ve been. You will always be pieces of your past, little pebbles of every person you’ve ever dated, ever loved, ever kissed. That is okay. That is more than okay because this is what is so beautiful about every single person’s past—it builds you. Without it, you would not be who you are today.