This Valentine’s Day Remember That You Don’t ‘HAVE To’ Show Your Love, You GET To
Here we are coming up on another Valentine’s Day. A holiday that brings about mixed emotions because of bad or disappointing past experiences. Times where you spent money on people and they broke up with you a week later, or even got broken up the day before, or even on Valentine’s Day. The worst. Sometimes we even a tendency to become very off put by the gooey and overrated aspect which often revolves around every February 14th. It may have some very happy and fond memories too. Experiences shared with the one in your life and you cherish it as something lovely.
Every year, we end up immersed in ads and commercials filled with perfect couples who have everything in their relationship put together and modeling a way of love which is glamorized and sensationalized. The mass produced cards, teddy bears, roses, jewelry, and full dimly lit restaurants are shoved in our faces. It turns into a contest and there is so much pressure put on just one day. Anyone who has pursued something real with someone no matter how long it lasted can’t deny that it takes work and effort to have something meaningful. The ads are pushing expensive jewelry, chocolate, and extravagant gifts as a symbol as to what real love looks like for your partner. Maybe truly the symbol and tangible expression shouldn’t be represented by a price.
The history of the holiday, as with most holidays, has evolved and changed from what it initially represented to what it now means to us in our society. Today it is seen as a time to pay extra attention to that person in your life. Romantically or significant as they hold a place in your mind and heart of such amazing and wonderful worth. A common thought regarding Valentine’s Day is that it is silly overall. If you love someone and care for them you should be expressing your feelings for them on a daily basis. You shouldn’t need one separate event to signify that you have deep emotions for them. Why should you have to base your expensive gifts and time and energy around this one main day which someone at some point decided was the time do it. Let’s challenge our perspective. I would challenge those notions and say that Valentine’s Day is one of the most important and special holidays and days of the year!
We don’t have to do anything for the special people in our lives, we don’t have to do anything different than we are already doing. We get to!
When we set aside a day to celebrate, we put extra focus, attention, and detail on the momentous worth and their place in your life. All too often we get monotonous, passive, and even forgetful about what someone deserves. Yes, they know you care. But what if we put a little extra effort in once in a while and let this day be a reminder. Yeah, maybe it means buying something expensive. We are not all rich, and we shouldn’t be maxing our credit cards. What it’s about is the act, sentiment, and the heart behind it. Giving someone a tangible gift, a sentiment, and a symbol of what you share to let them know they mean so so much. So it’s a day, a day for us to own and share our feelings towards someone with a little bit more.
What if you don’t have that love, what if it doesn’t look like a Disney movie, what if you have been fighting a lot, what if you’re single? It’s still a day to share love. To love yourself, and to love the people around you. Buy yourself some chocolate, some fresh flowers, and watch your favorite RomCom. You deserve it. You’re amazing and you need to love yourself first. Don’t get bitter, don’t throw an anti-party, don’t hang out with your other single friends and bitch and complain about how things haven’t gone the way you think they should have in your life love, or lack thereof. The last thing you should do is sit in self-pity and it’s even worse to spread the negativity with others. Find the good, find the meaning of love, and be happy that others have it. You have to love yourself first before you can love someone else. If you don’t want to be alone, grab the kid with no plans next to you in the office or your college class and go see 50 Shades Darker and share the day with another human who I promise you is feeling the same thing you are. Make some memories and make it your day. Because it is.
If you’re crossing the day with a partner or significant other, it’s your day to share. So put a little bit of effort in and make it stand out. Nothing has to be over the top or break the bank. Something small still matters so much. Sometimes though, you just need to take a little extra time to spend together so go get some pizza, have fun, and just talk for hours. Stare in their eyes, hold their hand, and let them know that you’re happy they are there in your life and in that moment.
No matter what your relationship status is this Valentine’s Day you are loved and worthy of love. Make it a moment or a whole day and share the love. We all need to be loved and shown that we are cared for. Most importantly, you can never run out of excuses to eat more chocolate. Happy Valentine’s Day you beautiful human being!