Why The Rules Of Modern Dating Are Completely Screwing Us All Over

If I wanted to get your attention, I would see your good morning text and ignore it until late afternoon.

If I wanted to make you insecure, I wouldn’t compliment the selfie you sent me. I would plainly respond, “nice.”

If I wanted to make you feel less than, I wouldn’t take you out with my group of friends. We would hang out at my house only. Publicly unseen.

If I wanted to let you know that I do not take you seriously, I would do all these little things.

But I’m not that kind of girl, even if you are that kind of guy.

Instead, I would wear a smile whenever you were around, letting you know that I’m happy to just be with you.

I would want my close friends to know that we are together, because it means you are special to me and I am unashamed to have you by my side.

I wouldn’t play this competition of who cares less because it’s just not a game I can even play, much less win.

If I like you, I won’t contain it. I will not listen to this culture that tells me I can’t tell you how much I care about you because it would give you, the guy, the power.

(And FYI, friend, while you may play the game, too, you’re actually losing.)

You will lose the man or woman of your dreams being caught up in all these rules and charades.

Be loyal, but hang around guys to make him jealous.

Be trustworthy, but make it known that other girls are messaging you.

Be a little slutty, it’ll make you look more fun and he can get to know you more after you’ve already had sex.

Don’t be a slut. He doesn’t want a prude so you can’t be a virgin, but too many lovers is gross.

Be understanding, but understand the fact that he is always touching, talking, and hanging out with other girls cannot bother you.

Let her know she’s wanted, but don’t seem too clingy by giving her too much of your time and attention.

Don’t text him first, but he doesn’t want to do all the work, so text him first ONLY here and there. Also, remember to not reply quickly, but fast enough that he knows you’re interested, just not desperate.

Here are 19,374,942 articles about “Your Forever Person” and how to find them.

Now with all these mixed rules, directions, and advice, go out and find that person.

I personally cannot (and will not) adhere to these rules because I am not afraid to love. I am not afraid of rejection or what I may look like. I won’t run away from a person out of fear that I may make a mistake since that is quite guaranteed. I will not mold myself and hold back passion, care, kindness, tenderness, vulnerability, or the authenticity of my heart.

I am not so concerned about the possibility of having a broken heart, because the heart is one of the strongest organs in the body. It can recover. It can be bruised and still function. It may take time to heal until it is fully functional again, but it will get there.

The idea of scars does not make me anxious, as I am more anxious about being a human, yet not really being. Not really living.

Break the rules and be boundless, daring and truly live your life. Love boldly, love fearlessly, and love continuously.