An Open Letter To The Writers At Thought Catalog

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Dear Thought Catalog Writers,

I have the utmost respect for everyone who takes the time to formulate their thoughts and share them here with the hope of reaching others. As a closet writer, I truly understand how much courage it takes to put your work out there, anonymous or not, where it’ll be available for scrutiny by the public. I don’t want to insult anyone’s writing style or talent, or single out any specific authors or articles. However, I do have a request and it’s one that I feel too strongly about to stay quiet on the matter any longer.

Please, for the love of all that is good and pure in this world, can we ease up on the heteronormative, gender role-confirming narrative that so many of these advice articles follow?

I understand that the majority of Thought Catalog readers and writers may be female, but it still feels completely unnecessary to stumble across page after pager of articles telling single girls what they should do, or what specific traits girls look for in a guy, or what guys should- or should not- do if they want x, y, and z from a girl. Can’t all of these just be replaced with… person? What should single people be focusing on in their lives? What should anyone in a complicated relationship ask themselves before taking the next step? What sweet surprises would anyone appreciate from their significant other? What wonderful things can people who are struggling in life right now look forward to in their future?

Naturally, there will be situations where it’s appropriate to be very clear that the author’s perspective is that of a specific demographic, and having a diverse collection of writers is one of the things that makes Thought Catalog great. But whether it’s love, sex, or general life advice, can we ask ourselves a question when we’re writing: Is this advice that only girls (or only guys) should follow, or is this something any decent human being should be doing or thinking about?