1. It’s okay to be alone.
No man is an island, yes, but everyone can be their own islet sometimes. You have to understand that to live fully, you have to be independent and strong-willed that even if you are left all on your own sometimes, you CAN and you WILL. There will be times, inevitable ones, that you will have to be strong, smart, and brave for yourself. No, you don’t need to force yourself to have a boyfriend and no, you don’t have to cling to those people who treat you like crap just because you think, you need them. No, you don’t need anybody else. Just trust yourself.
2. It’s okay not to like what everybody likes and hate what everybody hates.
My dear, you can always choose the road less traveled by, as poet Robert Frost said. You can make your own path to take. You can decide on your own and not be pressured to want or not want what the people around you say so. Do not follow a trend. Make a trend. Be THE trend. Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself and for the things that you believe in. Prove to those people who you are, indeed, not born to be like them; rather, you were born to stand out.
3. It’s okay not to listen and not to care what everyone else is saying about you.
Words may really sting, sweetie. I do remember the things they’ve told you then – a short, little girl who cannot be picked on some contests because you just weren’t smart enough or that girl who may sometimes be a loner and who have only very few friends. Sunshine, there is nothing wrong about you. Believe me when I say that it’s actually them who have their characters so flawed to even bring you down. They just don’t realize that what they are saying won’t even make them any better than the things they’ve told you. They just couldn’t fathom how small they’re making of themselves and all the while, making you the bigger one.
4. It’s okay to say the things that you would’ve wanted to say.
That’s what the freedom of expression is for, sweetheart, and that’s why democracy in our country was even instituted. To have the freedom to speak and be heard. To say what you want to, with respect, integrity and responsibility in your words. You would’ve wanted to recite on that class you so loved, but you think, people would say you’re too “pa-honor” and too grade-conscious, so instead, you chose to zip your mouth and stay silent. Sweetie, that’s a big NO. You just wanted to say what you felt in that English essay or poem that you just have read and loved. Don’t hesitate to tell those friends of yours that you’re hurt with all the jokes about you that they’re laughing at while you’re faking a chuckle just so they will not know that inside, you’ve taken those words seriously. You just couldn’t keep everything hidden to yourself. Girl, just shout it out, scream it loud. Be free from those chains you’ve made yourself.
5. It’s okay not to care about grades and not to be in the top honor students list.
This must be so cliché but, my dear, those grades are just numbers that do not and will never define you. You don’t go wandering through streets with a label on your forehead that says, “I’m the valedictorian!” or “I was in the Top 10!”. No, sweetie, don’t believe when someone says that your grades will be the basis for your job. They are, at some points, an extra if you have high consistent grades; however, your competency is still the most necessary foundation your bosses or agencies will look at when you’re looking for a job. For the past highschool years of your life, it is undeniable that you have worked hard to, at least, have a spot on that honor roll but sweetheart, you may have learned it the hard way but please enjoy it – your teenage years. You couldn’t turn them back and undo how you’ve locked yourself out of the world simply because you’re too pressured to have straight As. Study very hard, but please don’t forget that you have to live life at the moment. You don’t want to lose those chances of making memories to remember when you grow old, right?
6. It’s okay to wear the things you wanted to wear.
This, by far, has been one of the biggest realizations I’ve had when I entered college. In a university that gives importance to freedom and equality, I have learned that one should not be judged by how he or she dresses. So, my dear, I know you live in a small town where people may say rude things behind your back at the instance they see you wearing shorts or sleeveless blouses, but I’m asking you not to let them affect you. They make judgments at a person without even knowing who he or she truly is and what you should instead do for them is feel sorry at how shallow they are as individuals. It is your character and attitude that are more important here so please wear those fabulous clothes you would want to wear. Just make sure that you still look classy and respectable and not slovenly as those people think you are. Until then, walk with your head held high with integrity and confidence in yourself.
7. It’s okay to have few but real friends.
It doesn’t make you a less cooler person if you have fewer friends than the others. Remember, as long as you know they’re real to you, and that you’ll have them for the rest of your life, then you sure have something to be thankful for. What’s important here is that you’ll have your friends to help pick you up when you’re down and hold your anchor when you seem to drown.
8. It’s okay to be insecure with some things.
It’s normal, my dear. We all have something from our bodies or our lives that we wish to change. Even the most beautiful models or the most popular celebrities do. Trust me, you would want to make those insecurities your inspiration so you have something to push you more into becoming a better person.
9. It’s okay to dream of things that people doubt you will reach or people think are impossible.
Keep on dreaming, sunshine. Don’t let them stop you from doing so. Remember what I’ve said earlier, you have to make your own path to take. It is you leading your life to what you are supposed to be. And God has unimaginable, beautiful plans ahead of you that you would have missed if you gave up on your dreams too quickly. Hold on to those goals of yours like they’re the only floating wood that would bring you to the shore when you seem to get lost in the middle of the ocean. Dream, sweetheart, but don’t forget to DO. Act and do something for you to reach your goals. As a common saying says, “Do your best and God will do the rest.”
10. It’s okay to be YOU.
Don’t change for them, sweetie. Don’t try to please them because people will never, ever be fully satisfied by you. They’ll find your flaws and your mistakes and sometimes, they will define you for those. But my dear, you make your own definition of yourself. No, actually, YOU are the definition of yourself. Let them judge you and see you as the person you are or who you want them to see, because what they say are not as worth it as what you tell yourself. In a straight road of the status quo, take a left, sweetheart. Make a curve. Don’t be afraid to venture in the world and find yourself. And once you did, grab hold onto it like it’s your parachute helping you not to fall face first to the ground. You are worth it, my love. Don’t let anyone else make you believe you’re not.