For anybody growing up in a fast-paced world, it’s easy to bend to pressure and routine. You are often told to follow a specific timeline on how your life should be, with a large part of this being relationships. Relationships are sold as being the epicenter of a person’s life, and soon enough, it’s all people want. To be held and supported by someone. To have a crutch. To always have someone by their side. But if the time comes that you end up alone, will you know who you are?
There is nothing wrong with being single, being by yourself. In fact, it’s in these moments that you are able to build yourself up as an individual person. It’s a crucial time to figure out what you want, and most importantly, who you are as a person. A relationship should be about discovering how people work together and not how you work, and if there is an end, it shouldn’t break you to the point that you feel you have nothing left, because you have yourself.
At the end of the day, it’s you that you have to live with. It’s you that you return to at the end of a long, hard day, and there’s nothing wrong with that. There should be nothing wrong with that. It takes time to be comfortable around yourself. It takes time to be comfortable in your own silence and company, but when you are, you find that it is easy to put yourself first in a relationship. You will be able to find the “me” even when you’re an “us.” It shouldn’t be up to another person to give you the security you need or the love you crave. It’s not another person’s job to define you as a person.
Allow yourself the time to discover who you are on your own. Find strength in being able to stand on your own two feet. Take care of yourself. Take yourself out for dinner and to the movies. Enjoy your own company and you’ll find that it is easy to do the same with others. Love will come and it will go. People will come and go, but at the end of the day, you’re left with you and you must always ask yourself, Will I be happy? A relationship shouldn’t define who you are, because sometimes it takes standing on your own two feet to discover the best things about yourself. You had your own identity before and you will have one after.