9 Ways To Make The Best Of Your Goodbyes

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You have two choices: you stay or you go. The last year of my life has been filled with much of the latter, saying goodbye to places and things and, most importantly, people that have made those places so great. The trouble with this is that I am horrible at goodbyes. (Or at least I used to be.) I have always been the person who blubbers like a grandmother, hiccupping and boogering my way through them, even though crying just pisses me right off. So in order to maintain my newly-discovered ability to “let go,” I have compiled a list to help you do the same, because God knows goodbyes suck.

1. It is always much easier to say goodbye with a hangover.

Because, in this case, neither party is focused on how much they will miss the other, but rather on how absolutely fucking awful their head feels. Warning: the after effects of exercising this method are worse than the blubber-filled goodbyes — because now you are not just hungover, but alone and hungover. Dammit.

2. Alternately, do not say goodbye when you are hammered.

Because one of two things will happen: You will either not remember the goodbye at all, or you will likely cause an embarrassing scene for yourself and anyone around you. (More often than not, both of these go hand-in-hand.)

3. Sometimes it’s easier to say goodbye in writing.

If you’re anything like me and despise the flood of emotions that comes with saying goodbye, write it down. Even if you sobbed the whole way through writing the letter, that’s okay.

4. Once you get over the heartache of saying goodbye, think of the possibilities to come!

Living a transient life means you are constantly on the move. And same goes for the people around you, who most likely don’t come from the same hometown as you do. Saying goodbye to a friend in London? Think of it as a new couch to sleep on when your next visit rolls around. You can be on the other side of the world and not have to worry about sleeping in a train station!

5. Recognize that not every person you say goodbye to is required to (or should) remain in your life.

There are many people you meet while traveling, moving, working, or spending a random night out that are not meant to be a part of the rest of your life. They have served their purpose at that time, for that reason. Carry on.

6. Remember: if you’re the one leaving, you’ve got it much easier.

You are moving on to a new adventure, an unknown place where you’ll undoubtedly meet more new people. Of course you will miss the people you’re leaving behind, but you, as opposed to them, are now lucky enough to be able to welcome a whole new distraction.

7. Similarly, recognize that if you’re living a transient life, saying goodbye comes with the territory.

Do not sulk endlessly. This is your life, and if you really want to see that person again, then you’ll make it happen.

8. It’s not necessarily goodbye.

The number of times I have said goodbye to people, only to bump into them in the most random of places, is a crucial reminder that “see you soon” is often more appropriate than a definitive “goodbye.”

9. Saying goodbye is often a great way to discover those who mean the most to you.

If you matter to them, you will talk again. And if you don’t? There are many other friends to be had. Don’t fret my friend.