5 Things Women Do After Having Sex With A Guy They Shouldn’t Like

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Freak out.

The level of freak out is directly correlated to how much said women should really not have fucked said man. The crazier the scenario the more intense this freak out may become. Say you decide to sex up that swanky fella you met at the pub last night. Seemed legit at the time. Now your wondering if your life will have any meaning after you can no longer find a partner in life since you decided to catch the HIV from a one nighter with a strange man. Well……that escalated quickly. Pretty much Murphy’s law comes into play here and every scenario that can happen will.

Tell their friends.

Well if your not some weird/shy church-goer type you likely have yourself a group of ride or die bitches that you know you’re going to send a plethora of deets to. This conversation can go one of many ways. Usually along the lines of “I fucked Johnny….” With a shocked, excited, inquiring responses to follow. If it’s a real shocker you’ve given them then there is usually a regret filled/mischievous acknowledgement of your failure to make righteous decisions for yourself. Followed by there “concerned voices.” Whelp. Fuck it.

Think.

Too much and about everything. “What does this mean?!”, “Damn I need to get tested”, “I’m such a badass” and “I’m always going to be alone.” These are just some of the things that will be filling up our thought bubbles into the wee hours of the night.

Cry.

Pretty much standard any time we are unsure of a decision we just made. For some just a moistening of the eyes may occur. For others….let the wailing season begin.

Get in to action.

Yup I have now come to the conclusion that “yes,” that was a mistake. Let the problem solving begin. Time for that akward purchase at the grocery store. Yea, try and throw in some candy or something so it doesn’t look like your sole purpose in this trip today wasn’t to purchase this First Response….Yup. Real casual. While you’re at it make that Planned Parenthood appointment to get tested…… fo free. Knock that one out of the park while you’re at it. TC mark

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