It has become a common belief that men are not attracted to successful women (so why do complicated women always seem to get the guy?). Okay, so I guess all men are looking for partners who are less smart and successful than they are? Surely they can’t ALL be like that.
How did this belief become so common that successful women everywhere have accepted this limiting belief as gospel? It’s time for some honesty.
- When you meet a great guy, do you immediately take charge?
- Do you start to fully manage where you go on dates and how often you see each other?
- Do you prioritize doing, over just being both with yourself and with him?
If you do one or more of these things, you may need to balance out your harder skills (some would say more masculine) with your softer skills (some would say more feminine). Otherwise, you are doing a disservice to yourself as a woman by not being the complete version of who you are. The softer side of what makes you a woman has many desirable qualities such as your ability to exude sensuality, seduction, passion, sexiness and fun. This is your inner fire, your ability to be receptive, accepting, fun, light-hearted, mindful, loving, compassionate, self-forgiving and trusting. You also have a harder side to balance to balance your softer side. This is your ability to take charge, make firm decisions, take action, multi-task, hold things together, get things done and manage the situation. The softer side, however, many women seem to have under wraps.
What many successful women struggle with is bringing forth more of the softer side in their relationship. A limiting belief among career women is that they equate their softer side with weakness. The truth is, getting in touch with that soft side isn’t weak; it’s part of who you are. You are a woman. Be proud of who you are instead of acting like a man. Stop apologizing for your emotional side and accept who you are and that, most importantly, you don’t have to act like a man for him to relate to you. In fact, this is a massive turn off for men.
Men are not intimated and threatened by successful women; they are just turned off by successful women who act like men instead of being the women they are. Are you guilty of this? I cringe just thinking about the amount of times I would try to take control of the situation whenever I would date someone. Always calling them and making sure our weekend was booked with enough time together. I was so far from embracing my inner sexy.
Knowing that embracing your femininity is a turn-on for men is not why you should do it, but you should do it for yourself. You will feel a lot more whole when you embrace all sides of who you are at your core. Imagine, next time you meet a great guy and this time you are fully connected to all aspects of your femininity. You allow the relationship to take its course naturally, which not only makes you feel peaceful, calm and trusting, but also makes him want you even more, since you’re not being so controlling and desperate anymore, allowing him space to be himself in the relationship. If it doesn’t work out, you confidently end things and move on without emotional baggage.
Here’s the fun part. Through connecting with your softer side you will exude passion, seduction, sexiness & fun to men and most importantly to yourself. You will own your inner feminine power, feeling connected and grounded in life and your inner sexy will radiate, having him begging to be with you. Then you can choose whether you want to be with him.