My Mental Illness Makes Me Even More Beautiful

I am a loner. I love being social. I am an ambivert. I get distracted easily. I own my mistakes. I allow others in and can easily let them go if needed. I preserve my joy like jam.

I’m boyant in life but also constantly struggle to find a reconditioned identity as I grow — but I embrace fully once I’ve found her. I gain strength by falling down. I am weary at first of love and strong friendships – but believe me when I say, I love humans who are growth game warriors.

I hold those I cherish very close to my heart and our bond is built on compassion and loyalty. I abstain from anything that makes my instincts scream. I startle easily. I love to dance in my living room. I love to write. I love to ride bicycles. I love to paint. I own my talents and broadcast my desire to share them. My heart is filled with both fear and fearlessness.

I choose to be single and I chose never to have children. I live a life of stability and chaos. I am my own anchor but ache for others to understand me. I get by most days, and sometimes I completely crash. The days I am on a high, I ensure everyone knows. I am a creature of habit and of renewal and change. The smallest of things excite me. My dog is my BFF. So are my parents. I drink beer, whiskey, and wine. I am a total weirdo – and that is my protocol.

I love to say Fuck. I also love to say LOVE. I have a sign on my forehead that says HEALER. I aim to do good in this world from the joy bubble I am creating. I get tattooed to feel alive. My eyes are wide open to possibility. I grieve. I sometimes just can’t to do it all. So I self-care. I have issues, I also have a lot of shoes. My age is literally only a number. I demand respect. I use my journey as an authenticity shield. I am vulnerable. I wear all emotions on my sleeve.

I have depression, acute anxiety, and PTSD. I believe my mental illnesses are beautiful human experiences and superpowers – and without them, none of the above would distinguish me from the rest. I am grateful beyond measure for what God has given me, tested me with, and for allowing me to serendipitously survive and up my growth game.