Don’t Text Her When You’re Lonely

Rahul Anil
Rahul Anil

Do not text her when you are lonely. Do not hit her up late at night as you stumble home from the bar looking for some temporary love to get you through to the morning. Do not text her during the slow parts of your day, when the solitude starts to creep up on you and you begin to long for someone to make the time go by faster, to make the moment feel less empty.

Do not be that guy. Do not text her when you are lonely.

Because here is the thing: she likes you, dude. And when she sees your name pop up on the screen, it will make her happy because she has not yet discovered your intentions. She has not yet realized the rules of the game you are playing, how you only have your interests in mind. How you are exploiting her feelings, her heart, because you merely want a confidence boost, or simply something physical.

And so she will happily reply, and excitedly wait to see what you have to say next. She still trusts you, after all. She still has hope and feelings for you. And so when you invite her over, when you act like you like her, she will believe you.

It is truly not fair of you to string her along in this way, to leave her a trail of breadcrumbs that leads to nothing but broken promises and sweet nothings. She deserves better than that, someone who reaches out because they are thinking of her and sincerely want to know how she is doing. Someone who cares about her. Not someone who knows that they do not plan on seeing her again until it is convenient for them.

She deserves someone who treats her heart like the force of nature that she is, the all at once brave and fragile entity that keeps her loving without hesitation and open for something more. Something real. Do not hinder her from finding this. Do not text her when you are lonely.

Because eventually, you will stop texting back as quickly, won’t you? It is all part of your strategy. You act hot and cold, interested and uninterested to rope her and and keep her guessing. But you need to understand that she is not this plaything you are trying to make her. She is not here for your entertainment, to stroke your ego when it is down, to be another body to keep you warm to paint the illusion that you are not alone.

So stop texting her when you are lonely, because one day she will not reply.

She will have learned the ins and outs of your games. She will have realized that your words meant nothing, that the two of you meant nothing. When she sees your name show up on her phone screen uninvited at 3AM, she will simply close the message and go back to sleep.

You do not phase her anymore.

Eventually, she will delete your number because she has no use for it. You are no longer part of her life, and she has absolutely no intention of letting you back in. She sees right through you. But she is not bitter.

She is simply moving on, ready to find someone to love her the way she so freely and fearlessly loves. Without hesitation, without assumption. With respect and care. And even though you broke her heart, you did not break her. She is stronger than you realize and that is exactly why you do not deserve her. TC mark

Molly Burford

Writer. Editor. Hufflepuff. Dog person.

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