man and woman standing near plant

When It Comes To Love, Never Settle For Second Place

I believe that love is not about finding the right person—it’s about how it will find you. Most of us don’t realize how lucky we are to have friends and family. These people are one example of that love, a feeling that we often take for granted. We often crave more love and attention, even though most of us already have enough. Our desire makes us so desperate for that affection that we tend to settle for just anyone available. Eventually, we let these emotions get the better of our judgement and overlook the complications that come with our decisions.

Some people are naturally wicked. Their words will trap you in a net of lies that gives you this false sense of hope. They will make you feel as if you don’t deserve to be with anyone else and that no one else can make you happy but them. Unfortunately, most of us strive to take advantage of the fragile and the broken.

Let’s face it, people make foolish decisions, but we should never surrender to its consequences. No one deserves to be in a toxic relationship. We should never succumb to the shackles of misery and accept humiliation.

Never settle being the one that needs to hide when going on a date because people can’t see you together. Stop accepting compromise as the only means to end the conflict. The words, “Someday I will be the only one and we will be happy and free,” should never be in your vocabulary. Put an end to all the uncertainties that prevent you from getting out of a toxic relationship. And lastly, set yourself free.

You deserve to be shown to the world. To be loved and to love without worrying what tomorrow will bring. Look past the lies and deceit. Think long and hard about the immutable repercussions of the relationship you’re in. Reconsider your worth. You may not see it, but you’re only being shown a tiny fraction of what you deserve.

A friend once told me, “Moving on is a cooperative effort. You need your heart and brain to work together with your body and soul.” I think that’s a fact we’re all struggling with, not because we can’t do it, but because we don’t want to. We can’t let go of pure bliss, even if it’s just for a moment. You want to keep that small amount of hope that one day, it’ll be just you and them.

The paradox of happiness is a perspective we can all ponder on. The more we pursue something that we think will make us happy, the more lonely and unhappy we become.

Don’t forget to love yourself first. Never be scared to be alone; don’t believe in the idea that people need to be with another human being all the time. Sometimes being in solitude is what makes life worth living. This is the only time that you get to know yourself more and the beginning of nurturing yourself.

Life leads us to myriads of roads where some are short and straight and most are long and winding. Pick the one that you think will work best for you and who knows, you might stumble upon that someone special. As long as you’re with the right navigator, no matter how difficult the road, you can always be a little adventurous. I pray that you may find that someone soon.

About the author
I’m an ED Nurse, wife of a moody editor - Miko, and a casual writer. Follow MJ on Instagram or read more articles from MJ on Thought Catalog.

Learn more about Thought Catalog and our writers on our about page.

Related