Here’s What Your Holiday Gifts Really Mean

Here is what your friends and family are REALLY saying when they buy you presents:

If they give you money and it’s under 20 dollars, they’re saying:

  • “I’m your Grandma! Go buy some hard candies! Or buy yourself one of those texting machines.”

If they give you money and it’s more than $20, they’re saying:

  • “I’m lazy, but I love you and I get you.”

If they give you a soap and body wash set, they’re saying:

  • “You’re a girl and that’s all I really know about you…”

OR

  • “You smell. Please fix that.”

If they give you alcohol, they’re saying:

  • “You’re over 21 and that’s all I really know about you…”

OR

  • “You have a drinking problem….but I support it!”

If they give you toys and you’re already in your teens or older, they’re saying:

  • “I still think you’re a kid.” And…GOSH, GRANDPA, YOU’RE EMBARRASSING ME!

If they give you socks, they’re saying 1 of 3 things:

  • “It’s the 5th night of Hanukah and I’ve run out of gift ideas.”

OR

  • “I’m a mom that gives practical gifts.”

OR

  • “You live in [INSERT COLD PLACE] and I don’t want you to lose a toe.”

If they buy you a gym membership or work out equipment, they’re saying:

  • “ I think you’re eating too much.” And, you know what, you should eat THEM! Or, you know, stop answering their text messages.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS, EVERYONE! TC mark

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