In all honesty, a heartbreak that nearly ruins you is the best thing that could ever happen to you. Because the thing with hitting rock bottom is: no matter how long the journey back to the top, you know that eventually you’ll make it there.
Don’t get me wrong, making yourself feel whole again is probably one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do. After someone so important to you walks to of your life, you can’t help but attribute your flaws and insecurities to why things went awry. And for a while, you’ll relish in that guilt — tell yourself “maybe if I was prettier or more funny he’d have stuck around” or “if I was more supportive and less needy he’d still be here.” Because it can’t be HIM, it’s YOU — you’re just undesirable, unloveable.
Sooner or later, that cloud of guilt will subside. Waking up each morning will get easier, you’ll stop crying yourself to sleep and that incessant need to drink yourself numb will cease. Slowly but surely, you’ll start to do the things you enjoyed again. You’ll learn new things about the world and about yourself. One day, you’ll realize that those flaws and insecurities you have are what make you, you and you’ll start to appreciate yourself a little more.
The greatest lesson you’ll learn is that you are not unloveable. It will dawn upon you that just because you weren’t loved in the way you had hoped, doesn’t mean there was any less love there. When you’re truly risen from rock bottom, you’ll start to appreciate the time you spent with that person. Despite the outcome, the person who broke you still taught you HOW to love.
They taught you to appreciate what you have because in a blink of an eye, everything you love could be gone. They taught you selflessness because you don’t just let someone you love walk out of your life without knowing that maybe it’s a better for them to be without you. They taught you passion and how to fight for what’s in your heart. They made you feel and in a world where it’s better to be detached than hurt, we seldom allow ourselves to feel anything at all.