5 Reasons It Sucks To Be The Sober Friend

In every group of friends, there’s usually one person who rarely drinks or experiments with any recreational herbs, if ever. I am the sober one in my group, so allow me to share with you some of the struggles my fellow straight-edged peeps go through on a pretty frequent basis:

1. People constantly ask why you’re not joining in.

Maybe I don’t like to drink; maybe I do drink, I just don’t do it that often; maybe I’m a recovering alcoholic; maybe I’m the designated driver tonight; maybe I don’t like to smoke; either way, people look at you like you’re some kind of science experiment if you’re at a bar and not drinking or not smoking with everyone else.

2. You are automatically the designated driver.

I don’t like a wide variety of alcoholic drinks, but there are some I don’t mind. In any case, most of time it will just be assumed that you are not drinking and you’ll be pegged as the designated driver, against your wishes. Maybe I won’t drink tonight, but I’d like to have the option. Rather than make the decision for us, why not show some common courtesy and ask?

3. It’s kind of awkward to drink water or soda at the bar.

I mean, c’mon, you’ve been there. That look the bartender gives you when you order a Coke? Awkward.

4. Everyone around you is under the influence.

Because what’s more fun than dealing with drunk and/or high people all around you? You can’t really have a conversation with anyone and you’re always outside the circle of whatever “inside conversation” they can understand amongst each other. Which takes me to my final point…

5. Everyone thinks you’re a buzzkill.

“Hey, do you want to hang out?” Sure, what are we going to do? “We’re going to my house to chill.” OK, and do what? “Just hang out and chill.” That’s it? “Yeah.”

Fun.