For the longest time, my mind has been wandering on how to cope with our breakup. I’ve wasted, and still waste, many days recollecting everything we did, the good and the ugly, trying to find some closure. I’ve tried writing or talking it out, but when you have a broken record, all you want to do is smash it.
The idea of us parting doesn’t seem to make sense, simply because, we never hated each other. We really liked each other, we got along, and if there was ever an issue, we addressed it the best we could.
I’ve dreaded saying this but, at times, the thought helps me heal a bit at night: I’m glad we broke up.
I’m glad we broke up not because I hated how stressed and hard on yourself you can be.
I’m glad we broke up not because you hated I could never get a good night’s sleep sharing the same bed.
I’m glad we broke up not because of superficial things or silly excuses just to get out of an uncomfortable situation.
I’m glad we broke up because you didn’t want to ruin us. From what I understand, you didn’t want to ruin a good thing. You had stuff you were dealing with, stuff I couldn’t help with or even begin to imagine. I only pray you get back to who you know you are.
I’m glad we broke up because my emotional and mental well being was not in good shape. You noticed the demons I was fighting within myself, even dealt with them yourself. You’ve seen the wrong side of me. You, now, pushed me to work even harder healing myself without others’ dependence.
I’m glad we broke up because maybe we needed a little breather. We’re both chasing our careers, trying to grasp onto any reality we find amidst our hectic paths. We know who each other are now; we, at least I, will remember what made us click and all the little things only we could share with one another.
Just know, I will heal eventually from this treacherous hurricane, just like you want me to. My only fear is we never get back to the eye of the storm, and I had held onto false hope after all this time.