To My New Beginning

null
Toa Heftiba / Unsplash

To my new beginning,

I see myself in the reflection of your eyes, someone who has been through all the painful conversations.

Had they put actions behind their words, and the conversations were different, had “It’s too late” turned into “thank goodness I arrived just in time.”

“I’m not ready,” meant, “Let’s do this.”

“I have to focus on me but you’re amazing,” translated into “Allow me the space to grow but without your presence or support I could not be brave enough to do this.”

“The timing is not right” turned into “I’m willing to put in the time and effort, here and now, for you.”

Then you and I would not exist. I have heard their lies and justified these same excuses for those who left me with nothing but the lingering idea that I was someone who was never good enough at the time.

Go slow, be patient with me because my insecurities stem far beyond you.

Your duty was to never fix anything about me; I have done that for myself, but your gentle actions and sweet words help ease the pain.

The most frightening aspect is that we have both been here before. We have seen this kind of thing bloom, blossom and blow up more often than we would like to admit or reminisce. We have been both been undeniably weak, and vulnerable, yet here I am again, surrendering myself to your existence.

What if we stare at little longer into one another’s eyes, laugh a little harder, listen closely to the stories we decide to tell about ourselves to each other, and kiss a little sweeter, because right now, while I have you, while the timing seems right, while the universe lets us be US, is something I never thought would be possible.

What if we follow this unknown storyline to the end because as the chapters get more exciting, the stakes only get higher, and the end game more rewarding, you just might be worth it. TC mark

More From Thought Catalog

Does struggling with your skin condition feel like being stuck in a toxic relationship?

Coping with a skin condition like Hidradenitis Suppurativa can wreak havoc on your life, much like toxic relationships. It can be obsessive, affect your sleep, performance, and family. It can feel like a draining internal and external battle.

Understand the Patterns