1. You are too liberal with the UP button.
2. You try to save your lightning bolts until you absolutely need them.
3. You groan and moan when you get to level 46 and see you have to beat a monster with 1,100,000 health, but you’re going to do it anyway.
4. You think the game is out to get you.
Damn the bombs!
5. Waiting to combine blocks feels like work.
6. But watching it go from 9,000 to 10,000 feels good.
Feels good man.
7. And you know it’s easy sailing from there.
8. Until you hit the bomb stretch.
9. The game is out to destroy your hard-earned sword blocks.
See this? This is a bomb block. They fucking suck.
10. You feel anxious every time you destroy the block chains.
11. When your character gains a level, it feels like you’re celebrating your first born’s first birthday.
12. You bet yourself that you’ll get Dionysus when you open the orange treasure chest.
13. You try to reason with yourself that it’s only a game when a bomb destroys your 500,000 sword block chain.
Still, I’m going to uninstall this.
14. You hate going against Medusa because that means you have to defeat her in 20 turns.
15. The daily lightning bolt recovery screen is like winning the lottery.
Thank you dear lord.