16 Funny Tweets You Need To Read Right Now
By Michael Koh
https://twitter.com/bakedbrotatoes/status/471433869984792576
[at the zoo]
Llama spits in my face
I spit in llamas face
Llama slaps me
I grab llamas hair
Scuffle ensues
Llamas gf shouts "leave it Gary!"— Paul (@FrenulumBreve) July 22, 2014
https://twitter.com/GermanFreckles/status/472089272271773697
if u wanna get laid by the hottest grils u have to have the fastest RC cars
— babby gril (@a_cute_bug) October 7, 2014
*Cool priest moonwalks out*
"Hey kids it's time to learn about the J-Dawg. Power up the church ipads & hit up dat bible app"
*does the worm*— Fred Delicious π (@Fred_Delicious) October 5, 2014
Please do not queef in my dojo
— John E. Cakes (@mattytalks) October 5, 2014
https://twitter.com/voraciousbunny/status/160832723064324096
https://twitter.com/lawblob/status/518110095163809792
i'm drunk pic.twitter.com/FTbigcGI0G
— νμΆμ΄ (@ughHugs) October 4, 2014
"Who is that stunning young man? Driver, slow down"
The wealthy Hollywood producer rolls down the limo window & throws his Slurpee cup at me— pensive calypso music (@pharmasean) October 8, 2014
https://twitter.com/tarashoe/status/407940074358059008
https://twitter.com/bourgeoisalien/status/488680349623681024
ATTENTION: Can the owner of the 'MarioKart Champion' tshirt return to security? There are several women here who'd like to have sex with you
— Alpha Male (real) (@SortaBad) October 5, 2014
Every so often, I try to fornicate a large word into conversation, even if I'm not sure what it means.
— Witchy Woman (@dreamthievin) November 20, 2011
https://twitter.com/DinkMagic/status/446061802598965248
https://twitter.com/boring_as_heck/status/89182327988699136