[at the zoo]
Llama spits in my face
I spit in llamas face
Llama slaps me
I grab llamas hair
Llamas gf shouts "leave it Gary!"
— Paul (@FrenulumBreve) July 22, 2014
if u wanna get laid by the hottest grils u have to have the fastest RC cars
— babby gril (@a_cute_bug) October 7, 2014
*Cool priest moonwalks out*
"Hey kids it's time to learn about the J-Dawg. Power up the church ipads & hit up dat bible app"
*does the worm*
— Fred Delicious (@Fred_Delicious) October 5, 2014
Please do not queef in my dojo
— John Vaccena (@mattytalks) October 5, 2014
these hidden smash brothers characters are awesome!! pic.twitter.com/J2Vm5wRyLY
— lawblob (@lawblob) October 3, 2014
i'm drunk pic.twitter.com/FTbigcGI0G
— 현춘이 (@ughHugs) October 4, 2014
"Who is that stunning young man? Driver, slow down"
The wealthy Hollywood producer rolls down the limo window & throws his Slurpee cup at me
— Nice Calf Haver (@pharmasean) October 8, 2014
Well…guess my "style" is a layered look:
Layer one: fat
Layer two: shame
Layer three: potato chip crumbs
Layer four: Old Navy
— beth, an account (@bourgeoisalien) July 14, 2014
ATTENTION: Can the owner of the 'MarioKart Champion' tshirt return to security? There are several women here who'd like to have sex with you
— Cryptocurrent Sea (@SortaBad) October 5, 2014
Every so often, I try to fornicate a large word into conversation, even if I'm not sure what it means.
— Witchy Woman (@dreamthievin) November 20, 2011