Freshman year of college is a difficult time for most everyone. The extreme stress of a new environment causes many people to begin doing things they wouldn’t normally do. The following list describes the stages most students go through in their first semester. From foolish acts to dangerous feats, this list will encompass each step with an example. Enjoy.
1. Lighting everything on fire.
“Oh, you took the wrapper off of your straw? Here, let me light it on fire in this abandoned park.” Admit it. We all do it. A buddy of mine lit a hat on fire. He was a real “hot head”. (See what I did there?)
2. Growing short tempered.
You trip over a crack in the road on the way to class. A middle aged brunette woman walking home from work sees you fall and asks if you are ok while a group of students about twenty yards away laugh at your mishap. “I’m fine!” you yell back. The woman shakes her head disapprovingly and walks away. You feel badly immediately and want to apologize. You look to see the woman and apologize. But she’s walking away. Eh, she’s so far. It’s not worth it. She’s too far now. This brings us to our next category.
3. Excessive Laziness
You finally get home from class. You pull off your pants and whip them on the floor. You take a running start and jump on your bed, ready to take a nap and watch some television. You set up your pillow just right and you are ready to relax. But wait. The remote is on the table about fifteen feet away. Instead of taking ten seconds to get up and get the remote, you decide to accept the situation and embrace the inner laziness. As a single tear slides down your cheek, you wonder if you’ve chosen the right path.
4. Eating like a Mad Man (or woman)
You decide to treat yourself to Friendly’s once a month. You are at the restaurant. You are looking through the menu. You decide to get a Honey Barbecue Chicken Supermelt with fries. “Hey, 1550 calories isn’t that much if I’m only having it once a month, right? Oh look, waffle fries are only 49 cents more. Why not? It’s only once a month! I will have a Happy Ending Sundae for desert. Wow, this is really cheap. I’ll start having Friendly’s every week.” As you can see, this causes weight gain. So the Happy Ending Sundae caused a not so happy ending. (See what I did there)