11 Real Thoughts Every Girl Has When Trying To Impress A Guy

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1. Am I that ugly?

“Why didn’t he notice my hair that I spent 2 hours on this morning?” or “I woke up extra early today just so I could do my makeup right and he didn’t even give me a second glance.” I think we can all say that we’ve been through this phase of early morning make-overs; from curling irons to contouring to drowning yourself in a bottle of perfume. Basically, we’ve tried anything beauty wise just so his idea and impression of us would be spot on. But the reality is he doesn’t even give us a second glance. If I could just walk up to his face and say “I SHAVED MY LEGS FOR YOU” I would.

2. Maybe I need to act a bit more clever

Trying to act like something or someone you’re not is the worst possible thing you can do while trying to impress someone. Although some girls try to play it out as being intelligent and smart, most girls like to go the other direction and play it dumb. I honestly don’t understand how men find lack of intelligence attractive? Not all men, but some who either fall for it or play along. Since guys are entertaining it, a lot of girls think it’s a smooth move to get the guy. I know you’ve been in a situation wherein you don’t know which card to play. But if you were to choose one, please choose to be yourself!

3. I better post a good Snapchat story today

“Ew! I look so gross” “The lighting’s better here.” Posting a good Snapchat story gives your friends a glimpse into your everyday life. It shows just how fun of a person you are… or how you make yourself to be. I bet it took you about 30 minutes to make a decent 20-second story. You want him to wonder about you and what goes on in your life. You show just the right amount without giving too much away so you remain a mystery to him. Therefore he’d want to know you more. First impressions are what last a lifetime. It may not seem like much, but those seconds could make or break you if you do it right.

4. Boobs in or out?

Ahh yes… the question is whether to be conservative or go for the kill. No pressure. Well, it depends on the situation really. If you don’t necessarily need to show them off, I suggest you keep them to yourself first. But if you come across an opportunity wherein you can stick them out all you want, then go ahead! But really it depends on your personality too. If you’re the reserved type, then maybe you should just wait it out until you’re ready to make that big step. But if you’re the sexy, playful, flirty type, no one’s stopping you from releasing those goodies! Just make sure that whatever you choose, he’s into that kind of thing. And most importantly, you’re comfortable and into that kind of thing as well.

5. I need more mints…

I always have mint-flavored gum or candy with me just in case… you know *wink* A girl’s worst nightmare is getting close to a guy with breath smelling like shit. MAJOR TURN OFF. When you know he’s getting close, you can just pop one in your mouth and hope he smells that minty fresh breath you got there.

6. I should be wearing matching bra and panties just in case…

The ever famous matching lingerie. Everyone knows what’s going to happen when a woman wears matching underwear. It’s either she just happened to wear matching lacy panties to feel good about herself or she wants to get laid. Real bad. No, no. Let me rephrase that. She is determined to get laid. She won’t take no for an answer. Under all those clothes you still want to look appealing and sexy as hell. So you shave your legs, rub some deodorant on your pits, swallow a whole bottle of mouthwash, and you’re ready to go.

7. *Stalks him everywhere* Who is this b*tch?

GUILTY. I can honestly say that I’m guilty of doing this, but seriously who isn’t? I bet we all want to catch a glimpse of his past and see his cute little baby pictures, etc. But what we really want to know is who is that girl who had her arm on his shoulder 32 weeks ago on Instagram or that girl he had his arm wrapped around her waist in an innocent school activity when he was in 8th grade?! Well, whoever she is, I bet you’d want to know everything about her. From going neck-deep stalking in all her social media accounts, to doing a background check on her and her family, to finding out about their history waaay back. I swear jealous women are freakin’ FBI material. But behind all those crazy stalking tendencies, you just want to know what she was like and what he liked about her.

8. I think I laughed way too loud

We all know that one girl who has that very annoying and obnoxious laugh. It’s either she wants the attention or she was just unfortunately given a horrible hyena laugh. Anyway, we all don’t want to be that girl. It may seem like a turn off for some guys, but others find it refreshing and… real. Women sometimes try so hard to control their laugh that it comes out so animated and fake. Guys just want the real raw thing. If you think his joke is funny, then go and laugh your ass off. If it comes across as corny to you, then just give a little giggle and smile. You don’t have to try so hard. Just remember to have a good time and actually listen to his jokes, ladies.

9. Maybe I should move a little closer…

Do you ever get that feeling that you just need to be closer to him? So close that you literally want to just stick your body next to his forever? You’re not alone. A lot of women crave physical contact from the opposite sex. When trying to impress a guy, you want him to feel your presence. So you push everyone who tries to get in your way just to get a better of view of your man candy. And so he can a better view of you too. You catch his eye as you make a bee line for him and he just stares, waiting for you to come closer…

10. He tweeted! I’ll tweet something too so he knows I’m online…

Guys don’t tweet that much. But when they do, all hell breaks loose. After hours of waiting for that one single tweet, you would literally tweet anything just so he’d notice you. Those typical “I’m so bored someone talk to me” tweets will definitely blow up your followers’ timelines in no less that 10 seconds after the shots have been fired. After hitting that tweet button, you can only sit and wait for him to DM you or call you up.

11. What is wrong with me? Or him?

You’ve checked all the boxes on your list and he still isn’t giving you the attention you crave for. So you start to wonder if you’re doing something wrong. “Was I awkward?” “Did my breath smell like feet?” But after sometime you realize that maybe there’s nothing wrong with you… but with him. Or there’s really just nothing wrong with the both of you. Maybe it’s just simply unrequited love or you’re just chasing the wrong guy. So maybe it’s time to accept the fact that he’s just not that into you. Sorry!