All I’ve Ever Wanted Is You And All You’ve Ever Wanted Was Everyone Else

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They say love at first sight isn’t true. I’ve always heard it’s not possible. How could you know you love someone from one encounter? But trust me, it can happen. How do I know? I know because, from the first day I met you, it was over. It was in you that my heart found its home from that instant.

That was ten years ago, and here I am today, still by your side.

The only problem is, it doesn’t look anything like I want it to.

You don’t love me like I wish you would. I can’t share things with you like I wish I could because you’ve never wanted me in that way. So much time has passed with your stance never changing, yet I continue hoping. I wait with baited breath to hear from you and cling to every word you say. I tell myself not to give up; maybe one day you’ll change.

All I’ve ever wanted is you, and all you’ve ever wanted is everyone else.

Do you understand how hard that is? No, you don’t. You can’t comprehend what it’s like to watch the one you love with all your heart give their attention to others for an entire decade. The whole time I’ve known you and given my all to you, you’ve still never noticed. You don’t realize my pain. You don’t notice the tears I’ve cried over you, the years I’ve waited for you to come around, and the others I’ve denied in hopes that I could finally be yours. It sounds slightly ridiculous when I put it like that.

Others tell me I’m insane for continuing to waste my time on you, but to me, it isn’t stupid. I love you more than I knew I could love someone, even after all these years of receiving no love back. I’ve been a friend to you, a confidant, and your go-to girl when there’s no one else to fill your time. I realize where I stand.

I realize you don’t love me or truly care about me, yet I’m still here.

Why?

Because from that first moment there was something between us I couldn’t deny. And you can’t either.

We’ve always had something, no matter what you say. I refuse to give up, as foolish as it may seem. You’ve caused me a rollercoaster of emotions across this decade, but I still can’t give you up. You were my love at first sight, and the only love I’ll ever want. I’d choose you in a thousand lifetimes. I’d pick you from a room of one hundred others. It will always come back to you.

I can’t give up on something I feel so passionately about.

I’ll always be waiting, even if you never come around. TC mark

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