It was pain. Uninhibited, rampaging across your senses like a freight train. You sit there and let it shower over you. Tears brimming on your eyes and hands shaking. The beauty of coincidence, the pain of letting go. The bittersweetness in turning the page, basking in uncertainty. But there is a degree of certainty. Certainty lying in the power and grace of your memories. That the future is an open book, a blank page, but your memories, laid in malleable stone, are yours. They will sit on the shelves of your consciousness with a reminder that you can feel, that you can love, a reminder of your self worth. That you can be loved, that your body is yours and not a commodity to be objectified for lustful reasons.
Learning is painful. Loving is risk. Memories are built in sand, ready to disintegrate into the shore of your subconscious to be replaced with new experiences.
“When you fully trust someone without any doubt, you finally get one of two results: a person for life or a lesson for life.”
You sit there choking on your own sobs. Unable to inhale from your own nose, hence the overtaking of the senses. A weeping heap of human emotion, you wonder how you will endure this pain.
But you will. You will endure, you will persist, and grow onward and upward.
The rawness, the tears serve as currency proving that you came, you saw, you loved, and lived. You did not sit on the benches of life afraid to get your feet wet. You had grasped life with both hands. But you had not come up empty. You surfaced stronger, smarter, loved, and having met a great person.
Today may be an untethering between you and someone who you believed you shared forever with, but this is not the end.
This is your rebirth.