To The Girl Dating My Ex-Boyfriend

I hope you don’t take this as a threat or a desperate plea to get him back. It’s just a little note to remind you to take it all in. While you may very well be the one whose hand he takes, you probably aren’t. You haven’t been dating long, hell I don’t even know when or how you met, but I know who you are. I’ve seen your Instagram and Facebook pictures and so I know a little about you and, as much as I hate to admit, you seem pretty cool. You’ve also met most of my friends and I’m sure his family- so you’re pretty special.

Your Happiness First

The guy who you wake up to every morning is an amazing person. He will always put your happiness above his no matter what it means. Once, back when we were sixteen, I made him take a defensive driving course just so I could get my license early. He had to pay about $65 and spend an entire Saturday in a classroom watching cheesy movies and taking unnecessary tests, but he did it. He also sat in the pouring rain and again in the bitter cold to see Taylor Swift. You didn’t know about his secret love of Taylor? That’s because he doesn’t have one, but he sure loved me. I have yet to meet another guy who would endure half the things he did for me.

His weird body quirks

He is and always was an incredibly sweaty person. His hands were always sweating and I would always complain. But secretly, I loved it. I loved that he would put his hand on my thigh for all of two minutes and my pants would be sopping. His fingers were also really wide. Once we actually realized then when we were holding hands, my fingers were spread as far as they could possibly go just to interlock with his. He also had a lot of smells. Some good, some bad. There’s the obvious bad smells that maybe you have not experienced yet seeing as you have only been dating for ten months. Then there is the smell of his body odor because, let’s face it, he sweats all the time.

All the Notes

So if you haven’t figured it out yet, you will soon…this kid loves to write. I found notes almost every day while we were dating (in a book I was reading, in a random Word document, on my windshield, etc). Make sure you save every one of them because one day you will look back at the post-it you found that said simply “You are loved” and those three words will mean more than they ever have. Ask him to write you a poem, you won’t regret it.

His tears

Because he was my first boyfriend, I didn’t realize how much those tears meant, but now I do. Many guys consider themselves too “manly” to cry, but not him. It wasn’t that he cried a lot, just that it happened. He would cry when he hurt me. He was so unbelievably upset with himself for causing me pain that you could see it in his eyes. He would cry when he thought he would lose me. He would cry when describing his love for me. He cried that last night when we both knew we could never recover what we had.

So basically, this guy is amazing. He will always be the one that got away. Take it from someone who has dated many guys since him, he is one of a kind. He will love you to the moon and back times infinity. You will be his number one priority and he will fight for you. Guys like him don’t come around often, so make sure to be that girl who doesn’t come around often. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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