Is Tinder The New Norm For Dating?


First off I guess I actually have to admit that I have a Tinder profile…

Yes I am out there floating in cyberspace and being swiped Left or right on iPhones and Androids in my 50 mile radius area. Is it kind of freaky? Yes. Do I enjoy it? No. Have I found any other way to meet a guy? Not really.

My Tinder adventure started when I heard a friend had met a guy, texted for a while and had a successful few dates. I downloaded the app. I was more intrigued that there was an application that took your location and gave you a list of people to choose from. I also loved the fact that it is so straightforward. Look if your not attracted to me you swipe left and don’t talk to me. Then if I find you attractive I swipe right and if you also swiped right we have a match. Then you are allowed to talk to me. It sounds so juvenile but it is the best idea yet.

I’m out at a bar and a guy starts talking to me and I don’t find him attractive. What do I do? I’m on Tinder and I don’t find a guy attractive what do I do? I swipe left.

I know this sounds harsh, but no one wants to be told they are unattractive. This way there is no awkward rejection. Is it judging a book by its cover? Yes, but we all do that everyday anyway. I don’t want to be the one to hurt someone’s feelings so it’s easier to do it this way. This makes finding someone less messy.

There is also a profile to create. You can add pictures and a Bio and it is all set up through Facebook. Some guys write nothing while others explain their hobbies or what they do for a living. I find this part nice because then I’m not just judging a guy on his looks. I can see whether we have things in common.

So now I made a few matches. What do I do? I message back and forth with a few guys and get to know them. Here is the scary part. They ask you out on a date.

Wait a minute. I don’t know if I’m ready for this. I joined a DATING app and I’m too scared to go on a few dates. What is wrong with me?

I got so caught up in the idea of Tinder and the accessibility it provides that I forgot the main reason people are on this app.

Granted you get your occasional FWB only profiles. Or one guy who had a bio explaining that he had a girlfriend but was strictly looking for something on the side. These guys get swiped left immediately by me but it is nice to know that there might be girls out there for them that will be a match. It just isn’t me.

This isn’t how I pictured dating. I never saw myself meeting guys on my iPhone and meeting up with them at a bar. But I guess everyone says that before they sign up for But how justified is Tinder? Is it right to judge someone mainly on looks and find a partner that way? Is our generation too lazy to meet someone the “old fashion way?” When I go out to bars with my girlfriends it is hard to find a quality guy to talk to. Is that because he is at home sending messages on Tinder to many different girls at a time? Is messaging on a phone more important than face time these days? I say I rather meet someone face to face but if it is so hard, is Tinder really the new way to date?

If it is I can save a lot of money not getting dressed up to go out and buying a $9 cocktail on a Friday night. Next time I’ll just stay home in my sweats and swipe right or left. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Keep up with Melissa on Twitter

More From Thought Catalog