These Are The Best Types Of Loss

A carefree young woman with a black feather in either hand in the middle of a barren rocky plain
Jessica Polar / Unsplash

Loss of Hope For That Toxic Relationship – We hold onto toxic relationships hoping the friend you love will return the time you give her. We hold onto that hurtful partner, the one who has your heart, yet so carelessly cares for it – we hold on hope that they’ll change and love you in the way you so desperately desire. Deep down, you know these toxic relationships will never improve, and one day, you finally find acceptance, allowing you to lose hope in the relationship – and you are free. Free to move on, let go, and heal.

Loss of Expectations – Expectations lead to let-downs and let-downs cause bitterness; neither of which are good for our mental health. Additionally, setting expectations on others is especially unfair; it’s unreasonable of us to assume anyone will act a certain way – As my dad always says “When you assume, you make an ass out of you and me.”

However, the expectations which truly defeat me, are the unrealistic ones I place on myself. I strive to be a specimen of perfection and it’s a ridiculous endeavor. Losing expectations is a liberating way to live.

Lose Yourself In Love – There’s nothing more exhilarating than falling in love. The high you feel as you breathe them in while they sleep. The excitement your little heart experiences when their name chimes your phone, or when you come home from a date and you can’t wipe that shit-ass grin off your face. You lose yourself in hours of deep conversations about nothing, lose yourself in late mornings when only the two of you exist and the outside world becomes irrelevant. Yes, there’s nothing quite like losing yourself in love.

Loss of Preconceived Opinions – Sometimes we’re brought up to believe things based off of others experiences, other times, society itself paints people into boxes. When we release preconceived ideas, we’re able to lose our prejudices. We stop believing a gay man acts a certain way, or a woman is defined by her relationships. We drop our pre-judgment of those who are different than us in gender, sexual orientation, and race. When we lose our preconceived opinions we begin to see people for who they are, we comprehend and celebrate our differences, living without judgment in hopes that our world will become a little more peaceful.

Loss of Desire To Please Others – Constantly we are being pulled in different directions – parents, friends, partners, and coworkers – all requiring different things. Aiming to please those we love isn’t uncommon, it’s understandable. For most of us, it’s natural to unselfishly give of ourselves, however, when we take ‘people pleasing’ too far, it’s apparent we can lose sight of our goals, and certainly our happiness. Yet, by releasing the pressure to constantly please others, we learn valuable tools. We learn to say no and set healthy boundaries. We learn to make definitive decisions, and we discover when we put ourselves first, the people in our lives still love us and the world keeps on turning.

Loss Of Concern For The Opinion Of Others – There is one thing which becomes abundantly clear with age; life truly is far too short to care what people think. Happiness is found by living as our authentic selves and we can only find our genuine selves by self-exploration and pursuing what brings us joy. Why waste time and anxiety over the opinions of others when ultimately we are the ones living out the decisions we make? When we dismiss that concern, we are surely able to explore our beliefs and values, discover things which excite us, find what brings us peace and, over time we are able to uncover and chase what we consider our purpose.

Loss of Fears Which Are Holding You Back – This would seem to be the absolute best loss. Lose the doubt we have in ourselves, lose the fear that keeps us from pursuing our dreams. When we let go of fear, when we jump in, when we believe in ourselves; we’re able to blow our own damn minds. TC mark

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