The 6 Types Of Facebook Friends

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1. The friend you haven’t spoken to in years.

You went to high school together and haven’t spoken since that time in 2009 when you promised to keep in touch. You haven’t seen this person in years, yet you know that they are currently studying abroad in France, and occasionally will go to pub trivia.

2. Your actual friends.

This one is a given, but I had to throw it in there for good measure. Your pals, your best buddies, people whose kids you don’t mind seeing splashed all across your news feed.

3. The friend your best friend made you request.

Your best friends ex is now dating somebody new, and it’s up to you to use your Facebook as a disguise for your friend to stalk. Unfortunately, this one can be tricky, as people usually don’t accept randoms, but when it works – it is gold. Months pass, leading you to totally forget who the hell Lennifer Jawrence is, only for your friend to remind you that she’s been stalking her pictures in order to find one of the two of them together.

4. The friend you hung out with once.

An outing with a friends friend almost always leads to the “friend me on Facebook so I can tag you” conversation. You’re all out, you’re having a good time, and suddenly your friends friend takes a photo of you that is worthy of carrier-pigeoning right on over to Ford Models. You’re not friends on Facebook, and that can be problematic, seeing as you want everyone on your friends list to see you tagged in said beautiful photo. You friend each other, message how you have to get together again soon, then never speak again. Thanks for the sweet profile picture, though!

5. The work friend.

He or she is your bestie during office hours, but once 5pm comes it’s off to your real life. You get together for happy hour after work sometimes, but they’ll never be able to mix with your actual friend group. Besides, can you trust that they won’t go back to your boss after witnessing you in your human form? No, no you cannot.

6. The Ex.

Delete them.