It’s been a hot minute since the last time I’ve written in here, so here goes… That’s how I started my latest journal entry in the journal that I had been writing in religiously every day for the past six months, sometimes even twice a day.
Why did I take a month long break from something that served as such an important outlet for me? I’m not quite sure. I kind of just woke up one morning and grabbed it like an old habit and saw that the last date was nearly a month ago.
Naturally, I decided to take a moment and read my last entry, which turned into me reading that whole months entries, which turned into me going all the way back to the beginning of this journal and then searching through my half un-packed bins to find the journals that preceded this one. Besides the fun I had reading about my life through the past half year, I noticed a common trend – what used to be such a big issue is something I don’t even think about anymore.
I read through my complaints and prayer requests and goals and laughed at what used to consume my thoughts just a few short months ago. I compared it to the entry I wrote that night and thought about how things that I never thought would be an issue in my life are things that are now blowing up, and things that seem like the end of the world will be just a small speck in a few weeks.
Have you ever seen the movie Sliding Doors? It’s a good one, I recommend watching it and paying attention to what’s really going on besides the meticulous drama. As time goes on, doors unexpectedly open and close. Every little thing we do has a purpose, and even the tiniest thing, like missing a train, plays a huge role in our lives. Looking back on my journal entries and laughing at what I used to pray for and worry about, I also know that these things shaped who I am today.
That boy that I was head over heels for taught me a lesson without me realizing it, and that test that I failed ended up being the base of my motivation to step up my studying game for the rest of the semester, leading to my GPA being higher than I expected. Life is a series of chain reactions, and it’s fun to look back on the dominoes that started it all.
Life gives us a set of keys when we’re born, and our job is to find the one that opens the right door. We may get lost along the way, finding ways to jiggle loose doors open and finding ways to pick locks or miss handles that are blatantly there.
However, we quickly approach a dead end at the hallways of the wrong doors and end up back on track. Somehow, we all end up using the right key in the right keyhole and all the dominoes eventually fall neatly in a line. What seems big now won’t be in a few weeks, and what seems perfect now could fall apart in a matter of minutes. Cliché as can be, everything happens for a reason. Every wrong turn and stumble and rise is meant to teach a lesson.
Every failed attempt at love and every episode of drama, no matter how much it impacts you in the moment, plays a role in leading you to the right door. Just don’t hold on to the broken keys, and remember that even the biggest hurricanes shrink to a light drizzle of rain.