Sometimes, in our digitally connected age, it’s easy to feel as though nobody cares. As if the whole world is off doing exciting things, and you’re somehow left out. But that’s a lie that likes to take root within our psyches to keep us from soaring and spreading our wings.
And you were meant to soar.
Here are six things to remember when it feels like nobody cares.
1. Just because people are not calling you or texting you or showing up at your doorstep on the regular doesn’t mean that they don’t care. It’s easy to get swept up in our lives, and sometimes people forget to show their love. Don’t assume to know someone else’s feelings.
2. The one you love cannot know that you feel slighted unless you tell them. Nobody, not even your greatest love, can see what you are thinking. If you need more support, don’t hesitate to say it. If you need more affection, don’t be afraid to say it. If you feel as though you’re an afterthought, say it. Humans cannot read minds.
3. Remember that people show their love and affection in different ways—and sometimes it’s not your love language. Sometimes a friend will show up on your doorstep with cookies because you’re having a bad day and they’re just not sure of the words of affirmation you might need to hear. The lesson here is to look for the different love languages in your life. Just because it’s not the one you’re most fluent in doesn’t mean it’s not there.
4. Everyone has bad days. Everyone feels as if they are all alone sometimes. At some point, everyone feels as if nobody is listening or that nobody understands them or that they’re screaming in a crowded room, only to have their cries fall on deaf ears. Everyone wants to hit the pause button sometimes, to take a beat or a breath or a little bit of a break. You are not alone in that.
5. You are a miracle. A million things had to go right to bring you into existence — a million tiny little cells had to split and form and morph and change to make you into the glorious, beautiful, breathing human that is you. That is something to celebrate and something to hold onto, even in your darkest moments. You are a miracle. Yes, you.
6. You have to care about yourself. It’s a terrible feeling to feel like nobody cares about you or your wellbeing, but I hope you start changing that from within. I hope you treat your heart with the tenderness that it needs. I hope you feed your soul with love and hope and art. I hope you care for your body in a way that blesses it, that helps it grow and flourish into the magnificence that you possess. I hope that you find your circle of humans who show up for you the way you need it and love you in the language that you understand — but I hope you do that for yourself, too.