I hate labels, I think judgemental words are the worst thing in the world. Yet, here we are, running around telling people they are cruel, selfish, toxic. We constantly pass judgements on everyone and everything. The fact that I felt obligated to write this after reading another person’s story is probably a form of judgement, too.
Here’s the deal: I don’t think that any human sets out to be genuinely harmful to another person. I don’t think people want to cause others pain or struggle. Sometimes, though, the world can be a difficult place; it can be rough waters to navigate through all that is expected of us in these modern times.
I often wonder what happens to make people so bitter, so cold. Perhaps they have a condition that I am unaware of currently, maybe they have had to push through something incredibly difficult. They might be struggling to find their next meal, they might be sleeping on someone’s couch, they could be taking significant amounts of some form of abuse that they are too scared to share. We all have our own baggage, our own skeletons in our closet.
I will be the first to admit that I am a failure of a person. I am not always as kind and supportive as I should be. I expect a lot out of people, I sometimes need a lot of support just to make it through the day. I’ve said and done things that I regret, there is no doubt.
An amazing friend recently told me this: “You are worthy of life. You are worthy of love. You are worthy of friendship. You are worthy of help. You are worthy of all of the good things. Why? Simply because you are human.”
I keep reading all these stupid fucking articles on how to leave toxic people or why it’s okay to walk out on people.
The truth is, though, if you are running out on someone, maybe you are the one being selfish or inconsiderate.
Maybe you should consider looking at the situation from a different perspective, take a minute to walk in the shoes of this person that you suddenly think is so terrible. Maybe you’ll find out something you never knew.
Love is the movement, and we could all stand to work harder to love one another regardless of any discriminatory factors or labels. Everyone is worthy of love and kindness, even someone who may be going through a tough time that you don’t understand. As my amazing friend Kelly said,
“A good friend doesn’t leave when times get rough.”