“She didn’t trust people. So she built a wall. But then it felt like a prison. And it wasn’t easy but… She finally got out.” — Shonda Rhimes.
Debbie has always been referred to as the quiet type. The one you could trust because her silence made her a trusted companion, she was the one who could do no harm.
Right from school she had always been known as the mouse because when she did talk all you could hear was a squeak. Her teachers loved her for her silence because it meant she was well-behaved but hated the silence when she was required to talk.
Her father encouraged the silence because it meant she was going to make a well-mannered wife. People who did not know her felt she was a weird one and reciprocated the silence she bestowed upon them.
Her friends were indifferent about the silence because they were her friends and that is how they had always known her to be. But what they had failed to realize was that she had built a wall due to the norms and rules society had laid for her. Rules that didn’t permit one to be anything other than different. Rules that stipulated how you should behave and what you should do. Rules that stated if you haven’t achieved this at a certain time a certain age a certain period you are all but a success.
So in order to abide with this norms and rules she built the wall and she made it so high so that one could reach and looked at what she had built and she was pleased. Time went by and depression crept in and the wall she would keep her safe felt toxic and so the struggle began to get pass the wall.
But for that to be possible she had to do certain things. So she started by speaking when she wanted about what she wanted, she became a voice for everyone around her but most importantly for herself and she did so without fear and a damn in the world. Her father claimed she was ill-mannered and that no man will marry her. People who did not know her claimed she was a wild one.
Her friends were surprised about the new-found confidence and were happy because they were her friends and were happy because she was happy. And she truly was because as she broke the wall down there was a feeling she had never felt before ‘her freedom.’