16 Canadians Share What They Really Think Of The American Presidential Candidates

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Have you ever wondered what people outside the U.S. think of our presidential candidates? While we pull our hair out over Trump, it’s entirely possible that they’re just having a good laugh at our misery. I asked 16 Canadians — from Quebec City, to Prince Edward Island, to Saskatchewan — what they really thought of our current presidential candidates, and here’s what they had to say:

On Marco Rubio:

“I only know him as the sexy one. And I generally find the Republicans very frustrating because they have so much opportunity for attention in the United States media. We have conservative parties, and parties that lean conservative on some issues, but it’s very rare to see even one or two candidates get as much attention as all of their Republican candidates.” —Sara

“The only frame of reference I have for Marco Rubio is the Colbert video of him drinking a tiny bottle of water. He pauses, and maintains eye contact with the camera, and takes a sip of water. The video is just cuts of him looking parched. He needs to hydrate better if he wants to be president.” — Joanne

On Donald Trump:

“I’m fine with it as long as he signs off with, ‘You’re fired,’ after every press conference.” — Luc

“Disgusting. Absolutely disgusting. I keep seeing jokes that are like, ‘Hey! If Trump gets elected we’re moving to Canada.’ First, not loving those comments because only Americans are laughing at that. And second, that’s probably a good plan.” — Mei Lin

“I don’t understand how anyone in your country can keep eating up his lies. Did you read the statement his ‘doctor’ put out about his health being ‘EXCELLENT? Come to Canada. We have real health care here so you don’t have to lie about your UNEQUIVOCALLY EXTRAORDINARY health.” — Jacob

“I look at him in the way I looked at Sarah Palin: he’s pure entertainment. I don’t mind it so much because it’s not my country, but I’ll admit that, if it were my country, he’d worry me.” — Melanie

On Ben Carson:

“The doctor? He’s not a serious candidate though, is he?” — Karen

“I like that he’s not as loud as all the other candidates that seem to go shooting their mouths off at every possible opportunity. Call me Canadian or something, but I think that’s kind of a good thing. Don’t know much about his politics, I just like that he doesn’t seem like an asshole.” — David

On Ted Cruz:

“You mean the candidate that’s Canadian, but doesn’t want to be Canadian? He’d fit right in in Quebec.” — Sasha

“I’ve read so many articles about Ted Cruz, and the fact that he was born in Canada, but somehow is allowed to renounce the fuck out of us and run for president anyway. And it still makes no sense to me. Honestly, you guys can have him. We sure as hell don’t want him.” — Marine

On Jeb Bush:

“Didn’t we already have him? He looks a lot like the last one.” — Ryan

“So, I don’t know much about the Bush family, but I do know a lot about the Bluth family. And in my humble ‘Arrested Development’ knowledge, Jeb is the Job of the family. And I don’t feel bad about not knowing more about him. Americans can’t even pretend to know anything about our politics, yet I’m expected to give a shit about what Republicans you’ve dragged out to make assholes of themselves.” — Alexandra

On Chris Christie:

“He looks like the classic American politician. And that’s not a compliment.” — Emily

On Hillary Clinton:

“I think it’s ridiculous that it took the United States this long to have a potential female leader. Yes, Canada has not seen a female prime minister recently, but there was a female contender in our last election, and we had a female prime minister in the 90s. It’s not that I dislike Hillary, I just think it’s bizarre to worship a candidate because you’re starved for female candidates.” — Jennifer

On Bernie Sanders:

“Yeah. He’ll work.” — Laura

“Some people actually call Trudeau Canada’s Bernie Sanders. I voted for Trudeau, and obviously he won, so it says something about my politics, and how I could see someone like Sanders being well-received in our country. Of course, we also have a conservative party, and far more liberal parties, so I think Sanders would be much more middle-of-the-road in Canada than he is in the U.S..” — Mathieu