No one’s a perfect person all the time. We were just better at hiding that fact before social media happened. Now we often choose to express our less than savory instincts on social media, rather than shutting them down. It’s given us outlet to be rude, without having to own up to our actions in person. Thanks to the cloak of tHe InTeRNeT*~# we have something to hide behind and somehow manage to get away with pulling these passive aggressive social media maneuvers:
1. Refusing to like photos based on the fact that you’re not in them.
I’m sure you’re gorgeous, but would your face really have improved the picture so much that you’re going to be upset that you weren’t in the group shot? It happens. There will be other group pictures. Being petty about this is not a worthwhile way to spend your time.
2. Sending a Snapchat to everyone on your list of friends just so you can announce to the person you like that you’re going out tonight.
That move is so cryptic that the person on the receiving end won’t be able to discern anything from your blurry photo of a bar. They’re not going to get the snap and suddenly say, “oh yeah, this means she’s available but just needs me to reach out. I can totally do that.” Just save yourself the trouble and send them a text.
3. Tagging a friend in the comments section of a quote that’s clearly saying something negative about them.
It’s one thing to tag a friend in an article that could help them, or a quote that reminds you of them. That’s lovely. It’s another thing to find any e-card about “frenemies” or about the friend who always gets too drunk, or sleeps with a lot of people and tag them. Don’t make your friends feel like you disapprove of their habits, especially not via Facebook.
4. Unfriending, unfollowing or un-connecting sprees of any kind.
Apparently this is a growing status genre because these statuses are no longer limited to “getting rid of my FB friends, congrats on making the cut.” They now exist with Linked In and Twitter jargon too. The only thing worse than someone telling you that you’re not worthy of their Facebook friendship is someone telling you that you’re too much of a failure to be their professional connection on Linked In.
5. Posting a photo of beautiful weather while your friends are stuck at home living through a winter reminiscent of Dante’s 6th circle of hell.
Choose your caption with care.
6. Sending a snap of the party your other friends weren’t invited to.
All this really says is that you weren’t nice enough to extend the invitation. Sure, not all parties are open to the public, but do you really need to rub it in someone else’s face?
7. Posting overly specified rants targeting a specific person.
You’re literally just asking for someone to read your status aloud to a group of people who will then take bets on who you might be talking about.
8. When you tag the people on Facebook or Twitter that you’re thankful for, or love, or are #blessed to have in your life and you purposefully leave some out.
If the point of making five people feel good is actually to make one person feel bad, then you can’t pass your post off as “well-intentioned.”
9. When you post a picture in which all of your friends look like aliens but you look like Beyoncé.
Sometimes you just want to look like the Queen, but that doesn’t mean you need to treat your friends like the Destiny’s Child sidekicks everyone forgets about. Beyoncé would never embarrass Kelly Rowland like that. Learn from her.
10. When you specifically opt out of liking someone’s Facebook status because you’re disapproving or jealous of their life event.
If you don’t believe you’ve ever done this, then you’re in denial. A friend gets a job when you’ve been unemployed for a year? No like for them. A friend moves in with her boyfriend but you think they’re moving way too fast? No like for them. Do you really want to be the person who denies Gretchen Weiner a candy cane? Because that’s who you’re being right now.