You know the age-old phrase, the mantra, the passive saying of good things come to those who wait? Fuck that. Fuck that hard. Right in the ass, with no KY. I’m so sick and fucking tired of hearing this that I want to stab myself in the eardrum, with a rusty screwdriver, every damn time I hear some fuckwad repeat it.
First, let me give you a little bit of a backstory, I am 29 and single. I would like to find the type of girl who exceeds my expectations and makes me want to undoubtedly settle down. I have been working at creating music since I was 12 years old. I want to be recognized for my art. I’ve been working on my writing for the last decade, and I want to find my true voice and make it heard. These are not the things that come to someone who sits idly by and lets the world pass, assuming things will work out because they’re waiting patiently. These things come to the people who are willing to get up, grab life by the balls, say “fuck you fate,” and go make shit happen. One way or another.
Let’s start with the last thing I mentioned, my writing, and work our way backwards. Do you think I’d be able to find my voice, get published, and hone my literary talent by just waiting patiently? Maybe if I really believe it, hope really hard, and be completely content with the time it takes then it’ll all work out, right? Fuck no.
I need to promote myself. I need to write constantly, even on the days that I don’t necessarily feel it. I need to read my older work, compare it with my newer work, and see how I’ve grown. I need to see what resonates with an audience and what barely even gets a glance. I can’t sit around and wait, just assuming with a blind faith that all of my aspirations can be reached when the stars align and “the time is right”. That might be suitable for some pussy who’s too afraid to take a good punch from life, the type of pussy who can’t take a shot and get back up like “OK life, is that your best shot, you hit like a bitch!!” It is not suitable for me.
Musically, there are a million independent artists in the United States. Probably hundreds of thousands in Chicago alone, which is the area I hail from. How in the fuck would I ever get heard by just waiting for it to happen? I need to market myself, build a brand, work on the quality of songs I create, submit to every artistic opportunity that I find, and even then I’m just barely hitting the tip of the proverbial iceberg. Anything in the creative field can be considered an “eccentric path” and even “against the odds”.
That being said, you have to be willing to go out there, work for it, get rejected, keep going, get rejected again, keep going, take criticism, and persevere until you succeed. There is no room for “good things come to those who wait” in this life. Good things come to those who are willing to do whatever it takes to get them. The people who are willing to shovel shit and get kicked around by life in the process. Those are the people good things will come to.
Now, onto the last point…….dating. I know what I want and I know what I don’t want. I know what I won’t settle for. I want the next girl I date to be the last girl I date, because I’ve seen and been through enough to know what it will take for me to really date someone now. If and when someone meets those requirements, I am not letting them go. It’ll take the goddamn jaws of life to pry me away from them, because I have seen all the bullshit and met enough wretched girls to know EXACTLY what I’m looking for.
Do you think I’m going to wait around, twiddle my thumbs, jerk off using my own tears as lubricant, and just hope the right person appears in my life? Maybe when I’m out getting a burger or doing my grocery shopping? That shit is possible, they could show up there…….but if I’m not actively looking I might not even fucking notice.
What I’m not going to do is wait. Good things will come because I will continue to work for them and go out to get them. I will keep working on my writing, pursuing my music in the face of rejection, and going out anytime I can to try and find my special someone. I might also spend a little bit too much time swiping right, but the point remains. I know what I want, I know what I need, and I’m willing to put myself out there for it all.
In the words of hiphop legend Royce Da 5’9, “Plan B is to complete Plan A”. Plan A has never been to sit on my ass and hope for the fucking best.